“A tiny tip can make a difference? Huh. Well, I’ll never know.”

I am way over 19, and No, it does not.

How much for a ZJ?? 

CHARGERS SAINTS ALL THE WAY

Also, no offense to curlers, but the talent pool is much weaker than it is in golf.

“Football Clippers” is money which is reinforced by the ticker at the bottom of the screen saying “DEN vs LAC” and I think ‘why the fuck are the Broncos playing the Clippers’?.

Goodell: Who’s to say these retired NFL players didn’t develop their CTE from curling? We’ll never be able to say for sure.

Ah, if only someone - say, an occasional contributor to this site - had proposed this idea in 2016...

It’s always the women with the Can I talk to your manager haircut isn’t it?

This is way more Heat than that F&F garbage.

“Unsullied by wealth or fame” sounds like a line stolen from the Confederacy’s justification for maintaining the status quo of slavery.

For young kids, I think bathroom usage should always follow the gender of the parent.

Watch literally any interview he did with Randy Savage and marvel at the fact that not only did he never break, he kept the interview from devolving into utter insanity. Rest in peace, an absolute legend. 

God...Mean Gene’s pieces with Macho Man were pure art. He was a such an amazing straight man to the insanity that just went on around him.

Wow, Jordan’s friend is an incredible douchecanoe. “Six days in a medium-sized European city?” What.The.Fuck.

• FELL OFF TOILET, FELL ONTO A MOUSE TRAP, TRAP CLOSED ON PENIS

“Send him to me.”