This is one of those days where I want to suspend the Constitution for 20 minutes and outlaw a bunch of religous groups.

Apropros of nothing, I can’t stand Kelso when I’m sober but love him when I’m high. It’s the weirdest thing.

Ugh. I didn’t even know he’s a Scientologist.

The more I read and the longer I live, the more I realize “one size fits all” health recommendations really need to be taken with a grain of salt. Literally, in my case - I spent two months of a crazy hot summer sick as hell because I bought into “salt is the devil” even though I was suffering from sodium deficiency.

Grace taught me that a chicken breast and martini is an acceptable dinner. I was doing it anyway, but now I’m not ashamed of it.

I grew up associating Fonda with exercise videos, so it was quite a shock when I caught Agnes of God on TV as a teenager and realized she’s a talented actress. I’ve been a fan ever since, always of her work and sometimes of her as a person.

Cue the claims that “Hanoi Jane” is making stuff up for attention.

Oh wow, they still make Olympia? My dad drank that but I haven’t seen it in years. In fact, my first alcohol consumption was sucking the foam off his Olympias.

I’m glad you found something that works. My acne was relatively minor and it still affected my self image. It’s a surprisingly difficult thing to deal with.

I even ran it by some witnesses to the exchange to see it maybe I was being oversensitive but they were confident that she was unambiguously being an asshole.

I told her about my recent trip to a local winery and how their unoaked chardonnay tasted strongly of hay. She told me my statement was “uneducated shit” and lectured me on what chardonnay tastes like. (Never mind that I was the only one that had actually had that particular wine in my mouth.) She had previously been…

Thanks!

I’m as happy drinking MGD as I am microbrew porter. Basically, if it’s alcohol and not gin, I’m good to go. :)

All I care about when wine is in question: does it taste good? I suspect all this “floral notes with a graphite finish” is an elaborate hoax born in the middle ages.

The only way gin will ever taste good to me is to completely filter out the flavor of juniper.

“1. If you are new to cocktails, order something off the menu.”

There’s also an age where you realize that people who would judge you for stuff that doesn’t really matter are people whose opinion doesn’t really matter.

I love me a vodka based, liqueur-flavored cocktail but I’m still the first to say putting something in martini glass doesn’t make it a martini.

“Vodka, please.”

A fight about chardonnay once ended a friendship. I wish I was kidding. (Her being an asshole about it and refusing to apologize when I called her on it was the straw that broke the camel’s back and we never spoke again.)