2016 has been a fucking weird year man.......Now I’m Team Crowe???

Who else am I going to end up defending/agreeing with this year?
Ted Fucking Nugent?
That happens.....I’m packing it in until 2017

I mean, what are you supposed to do if a dinner party guest starts talking about stabbing your other guests in the neck and makes a move to start smashing dishes? Just let her wreck the place? Wait for her to hurt someone?

Trevor Noah nailed this one perfectly: there is a massive difference between using obscene language to talk about your totally consensual sexual experiences and talking about sexually assaulting someone. Is the first one kinda shitty, depending on the situation? Yea. Do your friends probably want you to shut up…

My takeaway:

You’ve definitely banged your second cousin.

Just did the math — I’ve been disgusted by Sean Penn for six years longer than his new girlfriend has been alive.

It was very good, basically calling Murphy the most underrated performer of his generation, probably the best comic, and giving a persuasive and sympathetic review, or re-review, to Norbit.

Will Eddie Murphy still be Mushu

She’s attending Paris Fashion Week, where she knows she will be filmed, photographed, and written about. Part of her brand is being fashionable and she can’t repeat outfits. She wasn’t carrying it all around; she was robbed in her hotel room. It makes sense to me that she would travel with a lot of expensive jewelry…

I don’t think Mariah knows her.

Please. Mimi would eat that little bitch for breakfast and would still have time for a slice of Ariana Grande as dessert.

Honey, I’ve lived in Brooklyn and worked in Manhattan for almost two decades. I haven’t listened to the radio in years...and yet I hear music outside, on t.v., etc. that I would not choose to listen to. Lol, love that you tried to do the “I’m a New Yorker” dazzle on me, though. I’m with you--I try not to go many…

You sound fun.

By the Sea was their Gigli.

So once upon a time, there was a website named Gawker that liked to make concrete statements about people while attributing the info behind them to “anonymous sources...”

Never go full Fieri.

Dude, if I were the poor sister I would tell bride sister to absolutely take rich sister’s money. Then we could split the cash to go do something awesome just the two of us. And if we’re feeling bitchy we could plaster pics all over Facebook of our great time together. We could even tag mean sister like, “Without Mary…

Because Vogue is for the greedy and entitled.

That’s true, but that’s why punching upward works and punching down doesn’t.