Places my black ass will never visit:

Yeah, a pretty crappy excuse, if you ask me.

I’m imagining you punching a wall after you said that.

Looks to me to be a flux capacitor. Likely putting out 1.21 Gigawatts.

+1 for the obviously made up name of Mirko Dickhaut (goes back to giggling uncontrollably)

Me think hordes of undead should only be musicians.

Donald Glover

Donald Glover... Not Danny
Not trying to be a jerk about it. But... someone could lol

For those who think there will never be another Usain Bolt, think again. Somewhere out there a young boy, sitting alone in his living room, was inspired by watching the unbelievable feats that Bolt has achieved. At that moment he said to himself, “When I grow up, I’m going to college, and becoming the greatest chemist…

At least the truck stood its ground...

This whole story was so blatantly ridiculous that I was surprised it wasn’t an email forward from my mother

Too bad the directors did not shoot first.

If that happens, it’ll be too late for them to wash their hands of it as anyone with a brain in their head can figure he was likely beaten into a coma or severely malnourished.

That’s exactly what happened. That and caring for him probably was expensive.

Part of me thinks that he’s near death and North Korea only let him go bc they don’t want a dead American on their hands,

camouflage or not, we see you kylie.

He could have Dodged it, but *puts sunglasses on* he chose to Ram it.

I didn't know the dude left his dog in the car. That's kinda awful.

"Sir, the possibility of successfully navigating an asteroid field is approximately 3,720 to 1."

"I am the walrus" - John Lennon. If Kurt Cobain were the walrus he would still be alive as he would not have had fingers to pull a trigger.