My friend is a devoted Adam Sandler fan and convinced me to watch this with him. In a theater filled to the brim with 6 people, I spent the entirety of the movie heavy sighing and rolling my eyes to the point where the staff asked me to leave.

Looks like the Nets sided with Big Money.

I only saw it because you've trained me to search for the crazy, silver Yelp lining in these stories. I did see one creative review about Kumar, the Kabob-Wielding Slaver.

A kid who was late to my class once said that he was helping someone out of a burning building. I laughed and told him to take a seat. You have to begrudgingly admire someone with the chutzpah to try to pull off such a dumb and blatantly made up excuse.

I had a roommate who was supposed to go to a going away party for someone she didn't particularly give a shit about, so the excuse she gave? "I have to wash my sneakers."

"The only reason I don't have a hard-on is because I had a Snickers earlier today!"

"The NFL has consistently shown throughout the Ray Rice saga it has no idea how to deal with domestic assault"

It's also consistently shown it has no idea how to deal with clock operators (the last 2 seconds of the Oakland/SD game, the Texans/Colts SNF game last year, seconds consistently running off the clock after…