This is real life. I’d say the Creed Shreds video has better musicianship than this.

GUITAR SOLO!

This is great. Did anyone happen to measure the canary-eating grin on the newly-elected city council member’s face? I’ll set the over/under at 0.75 miles.

You’re messing up. Bachelor/ette is the weak shit. If you want the good shit, that super concentrated shit that will keep you coming back, you go Bachelor in Paradise. It’s the worst of the worst on a beach with unlimited booze. It’s like watching a trainwreck on acid.

can’t just kinda lay down and switch off because that’s not how it works

Like the terribly fascinating lawsuit between Oklahoma State and Texas over Joe Wickline. And by fascinating I mean petty and hilarious.

I think one thing that gets overlooked about Ben’s scrambling is how much pressure it puts on the opposing team’s secondary. When his line was garbage, he was so good at lumbering about which would a) open passing lanes, and b) make it almost impossible for defensive backs to cover for that long. He’s had to do that…

Won’t you help?

Dabo: “How’s it look, doc? Can he play?”

I assumed because it’s not the National Football League Punters Association.

I’ve benzoin that for years.

Or dead.

That’s his sandcastle building cup. Nobody is allowed to touch his sandcastle building cup.

I mean, Ann Coulter says that every time she’s on Real Time. Or TV in general. Or while getting peed on.

Pittsburgh is a cat town.

*sniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiff* Mmmm, yes. That is a well-aged selection of righteousness. A fine vintage, indeed. Quite.

I don’t understand all the hate. The Rams have been so bad, St. Louis should thank LA for taking Demoff their hands.

Wait. What’s this about the Warriors now?

Yesterday I had three great meals. I already talked about breakfast, and the others were lunch and dinner.