Time for the dark, twisted world of SMB 1-1 to become part of Dark Souls canon.

Can the 2020 election come any sooner?

I still instinctively type in Deadspin to find the hot takes, but there are no more takes. I just got finished with instinctively typing in Splinter.

The Onion just had an article hit my FB feed where it was basically, “Hey visit the the phone store where we will fuck your shit up”

Halloween needs to be the last Friday, Saturday and Sunday of the month.

Jarate is cool and all, but TF2 did it like a decade ago.

This is nice. Stick to boats.

Hey now, this is not a sports page. Stick to jorts.

Stick to sprouts.

I’m just here because I’m not greyed here and fuck the suits for crippling Deadspin to the point where the entire future of G/O is in jeopardy. I don’t see things ending well for everyone.

Yes.

RIP Deadspin, which was the site that was the gateway drug to the rest of the Gawkerverse for me.

Nissan Versas ahoy!

KIA RAY GANG WE OUT HERE

I’m not seeing the tie-in to North Korea.

Mother would be so proud.

Reverse: Yeah, Hitler was dumb.

Finally, a chance to write a better conclusion to Game of Thrones.

Taxes and Hitler, huh?

The robots will have their revenge. If not this decade, then the next.