Well obviously Michelle should have encouraged kids to eat diamonds instead.

While Melania is making up her mind, it’s costing New York City more than $1 million per day to keep the Trump family safe

I believe it. But secretly, I’m hoping she never has to decide, because I’m hoping he’ll be out of the White House before the end of the school year.

Please let me out first.

Im glad to know I’m not the only one who used to find him attractive but was disgusted by my attraction. Yeah, now I’m just disgusted and would not let him within fifty feet of my uppity vagina (call back to another thread, because I will always only refer to my vagina as uppity from here on out).

And male. Just in case anyone’s vagina was thinking of getting uppity.

“I hope they play all their hit.”

no one in their right mind would ever fuck them?

Hey, it’s one way to get out of my credit card debt.

The alternative fact of the matter is that he won 95% of the total votes and his approval rating is higher than an adorable kitty hiding in a box of packing peanuts

Hot take: Religious people are hypocrites. They don’t care about things like prayers or following the word of God.  

How have I not heard this analogy before? It’s so apt!

There once was a fool from Manhattan

Did you ask him if he prefers the ACA to Obamacare?

i’m trying to buy a house right now.

I see no reason not to direct anyone in a MAGA hat and an ill-fitting American flag tee shirt to Southeast.

I don’t think he buys what he’s selling. “They’re running out of dresses” is such a simple-minded, naive fabrication that it’s almost charming, but no I honestly believe this is KILLING Donald. He pulled the mother of all cons to win King Of The World, and no one will come to his party, because no one loves him. This…

Love it!