“he’s fixed but loves to hump his monkey.” Yay, we should all be so lucky!

Adorbs! Is the other half Shih Tzu? I only ask because he reminds me of the Shih Tzu we had when I was growing up.

sooo cute

SMOOCH.

Those welfare recipients with no jobs and nothing better to do!

So if English becomes the official language does that mean they’ll start teaching it in schools?

This is particularly funny coming from Pennsylvania, a state which once had one of the biggest population of German speakers and whose largest tourist draw for populations is from a group that still speaks English as a second language.

Especially when they apparently have only a rudimentary understanding of the language themselves. “are” “offical”

LOLZ!!!!

Yep, but nope, because judges have to avoid the appearance of bias, and if he doesn’t want to perform marriages for same sex marriages but performs them for heterosexual couples, it shows that he is biased against gay citizens, who might appear before him in court. So he really should be tossed off the bench, since he…

It’s always the people who are like, “Ice cream is an abomination. I don’t eat ice cream. Never have, never will. Y’all are gross for eating ice cream. It’s drippy and cold and nasty and sweet. And delicious. And it stands for everything I do not therefore you CANT HAVE ICE CREAM AT ALL. OR cookies...” who are eating…

No, it’s a license to get married. Gay couples do not necessarily have anal sex. They may not even have sex at all. Just like with heterosexual couples.

I found it somehow fitting that he chose a woman who was a complete fraud. She’s a great metaphor for the GOP field as a whole.

...and who was Albanian, noted for her work in India. There’s just not a single thing about it that’s not laughable.*

Last time I attended a Mass that wasn’t a wedding or a funeral was in suburban Philadelphia while a priest was on trial for child molestation, and the pastor used his sermon to explain how the affordable care act was the same thing as rape. About 15-20 people, all around my age, left in the middle of the homily…

Yeah, like he is probably the best pope in history but like he is still a fucking pope so that is literally saying nothing. It would be like being the kindest dictator.

I am struggling to think of something I would enjoy more than watching Downton Abbey while trading barbed commentary with the Queen.

“That’s not how you have a tryst in Liverpool! I should know”.