I would do anything for love...but I won’t leave the seat down!

“From TV GUIDE, January 1999: ‘All in all, I found “The Sopranos” to be a smart, thrilling, and thought-provoking new drama. The only questionable element is the off-putting and truly inexplicable inclusion of pop sensation MEATLOAF as a “Crypt Keeper”-esque master-of-ceremonies leading in and out of every episode…

The first time I heard the song I thought it was about butt stuff. There’s not a lot of things it could be.

And Meat Loaf fuckin’ hosts it for a whole minute, before shuffling over to catch his breath while Ellen Foley hosts until the chorus.

MEATLOAF: Welcome to my castle. Tonight... Downton Abbey.

Butt Stuff. It’s butt stuff he won’t do, isn’t it?

We had Meat do a Cameo for my dad’s birthday. One of my brothers had us add “Your kids said to send nudes. And I’d do anything for love, but I won’t do that” to the suggestion box. Meat didn’t quite understand, and the result was really, really funny. This video is one of my prize possessions.

I don’t even care what the show is just so long as it’s hosted by Meatloaf in a blouse drinking from a goblet on a throne in a castle.

Unplanned pregnancy? Plan to save big at the Abortion King! Can’t pay now? Try our special 9-month financing option. We abort the middleman and pass the savings on to you.

Apparently he hasn’t seen the real alternate ending

“Abortion King”? I’m picturing a commercial with some guy in a plastic crown screaming about his low, low prices.

Pretty sure he just chose getting paid. That Police Academy money is long gone. And Davi will do anything for a paycheck. Wasn’t he in that Turkish propaganda movie about Jewish organ thieves?

If they gave a shit about the lives of babies they would want to pass laws about things like universal healthcare and maternity/paternity leave.

“Forced birth” is even more accurate

Occasionally modern SNL will still provide laughs, but I can’t remember the last time I laughed at a new Simpsons episode.

Stop calling them “pro-life”. They don’t give a crap about life, only about controlling women’s bodies.

Simpsons already did it

Being live has its benefits as far as staying in the zeitgeist.

In the promotional materials leading up to the big 700, “Manger Things” was sold with the idea that Homer would find an unknown room in the Simpsons’ home

Burns assuming that It’s a Wonderful Life ends with Jimmy Stewart’s suicide made me laugh (he would identify with Mr. Potter, of course). Maude was indeed shockingly grinchy here. It felt so out of character.