"Vomit is the most disgusting of bodily fluids (to me) and I refuse to sit here and come up with a valid sentence for the purposes of illustrating the Cold Lunch unless there is a significant pay raise in my near future."

"Thus ends today's Kimye wedding coverage." Thank God. I have no idea why Jezebel has been so obsessed with this ridiculous spectacle.

That's only half the problem. The other half is when a character who normally drives a late-model car all of a sudden shows up driving a car best described as "not a total piece of shit but worth about $6K instead of the $40K we shelled out for the newer ride." Whenever this happens, it is nearly 100% GUARANTEED that…

It's this: there's a car (or any technical thing, really), there's a guy, there's a girl. Girl mentions car. Guy talks to girl like she doesn't know anything about cars. Girl plays dumb. Guy's friend shows up, girl then spouts a solid minute of technobabble about the car showing she's a Big Expert. First guy looks…

With respect, I'm afraid I have to disagree with Mr. Cammisa. The GTI example is interesting but nonetheless an aberration: it's a niche performance vehicle with arguably only one competitor (the Toyobaru), and as such it would logically have substantially more stick-shift buyers than the norm. A much more interesting…

"For Austin to be such a progressive city, its police department is constantly in trouble for violating rights and treating people unfairly."

Incredible ad ... except I was expecting a teaser for a summer blockbuster, not a high-end Italian sports sedan.

That's what I expected, too, but then the 4-series coupe turned out to be only about $3K more than a comparable 3-series. So who knows?

Actually, the 3-series is now comparable in size to what the 5-series used to be. Basically, the closest analogy to the early 3-series (pre-1990) is now the 2-series, which for the moment remains available only as a coupe. (I'm not counting the X2; that's a whole other story. Ditto the X1.)

The 2 and 4 are coupes. The four-door 4 is also a "coupe," as is the four-door 6, as is the four-door Benz CLS. (To me at least, this car makes vastly more sense than either the 3 or 5 GT, both of which just look like ugly, pointless hatchbacks. Hell, it even makes more sense than the X6!)

"Yay! Back seat passengers heads get to touch the ceiling! But my car looks cooler and for only $10k more!"

The 3-series is still BMW's bread and butter. It's remained conservatively styled — the new one is barely discernible from the last one if you're not looking at its snout — for good reason, and it was the one Bimmer that escaped the horrors of "Bangledom." However, it has clearly not escaped BMW's attention that Benz…

I think they've lightened up. I was supposed to be in Vegas this weekend but had to cancel — thankyouverymuch, polar vortex! — and had reserved the new Mustang Penske GT. Not only was it comparatively inexpensive ($100/day with my AAA discount), the only "limit" I saw in the fine print I read was driving no more than…

What, seriously? Even the TRUCKS here are mostly 2WD, let alone the cars. If you see a Suburban or F-150 being driven by someone who clearly does not live in the country, it's almost certainly 2WD. There really is no point in getting AWD/4WD in this part of the country 99% of the time; it's just the 1% you need to…

I'm sorry, but there are two brazen errors in here — which I say as an unabashed oyster enthusiast who's tried nearly every variety under the sun:

Did anyone notice you had Tennessee plates?

The truth is the NV200 actually makes a really great cab. As much as it hurts to say, it makes a much better cab than the old Crown Vics that used to ply the city's streets. Sure, the Crown Vic is more fun to drive, with its big V8, rear drive, and willingness to drift through alleyways full of cardboard boxes, but…

Exactly. Btw it appears that Lewis was flying Lufthansa First Class, which has the rather unique perk (on certain long-range intercontinental jets, at least) of giving every passenger a seat AND an adjacent flat-bed (at no extra charge). See pic. While I detest this fake "service dog" bullshit, at least he (probably)…

"I read that block of text you posted and if you think Porsche hasn't "lost its way" via the garbage you spew that you are absolutely bias. Their cars are huge compared to what they have made just 10 years ago."

An 'embargo' is when a journalist, and a car company the journalist is supposed to cover, agree to withhold news from you, the reader, for reasons that have almost everything to do with the company's best interests. Jalopnik's policy is to not agree with these, but not for reasons of ethics. It just gives us a huge…