Jesus Christ, get over yourself.

I don’t think its lying when there’s a disclaimer at the bottom of the menu that says “p.s. everything here is plant-based,” but do carry on being angry about delicious food being delicious...

Once after sex I got an “I love you, Lisa”

Sometimes you have to meet people where they are. It’s much easier for someone who has casually been considering vegetarianism to transition off meat when there are alternatives that look and taste familiar. I appreciate anything that makes it easier on people to realize they can survive without slaughtering animals.

I love the taste of meat and I also really love animals. Good enough reason for you?

Please do yourself a giant favor and visit Crossroads Kitchen in West Hollywood. I’m not a vegan but this clandestinely vegan joint has some of the best food I’ve ever had period. Vegan or otherwise. Their whole shtick is that they don’t tell you they are a vegan restaurant (and when they do, they don’t use the…

Saaaaaame. I recorded the 60 Minutes interview but can’t bring myself to watch it. My fear is the second I watch it I’ll have to accept the fact that this is real life and Donald Jackwagon Trump is President of the United States of America.

I admire your faith in America to elect not just a woman, but a black woman, on the heels of this travesty. I wish I had your optimism right now.

Donald Trump is a lot of terrible terrible things, but Mike Pence is a legit psychopath. I’m praying for a murder suicide.

Hm. That’s interesting. I’m fluent in Hebrew and it’s definitely not a word I’ve ever heard. I’m guessing it’s biblical Hebrew - which is not the same as colloquial Hebrew. There’s a town in Israel called Shilo after the biblical reference, but it’s pronounced Shee-lo, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I am gutted. I am devastated, and given that I have dedicated my life to designing campaigns that advance social justice causes, I am seriously struggling to find my purpose today.

umm...I think you mean Shalom?

I was super annoyed by the fact that they capped the number of classpassers in many cases by as little as one per class. My friend and I joined thinking we could take classes together, but could almost never get into the same class - even when they were empty. Can’t really blame the studios either for not wanting to…

Classpass was a big disappointment from the start. My friend and I joined late 2014 thinking it was something we could do together, but every time we’d try to sign up for a class only one of us would get in. There was one pilates class that we both really wanted to take and she got in but it was showing as full for…

I actually thought they did a pretty good job of making Rory look like a bitch for treating Dean the way she did. They really made you work hard to warm up to Jess.

Starred for mention of Babette. Underrated character.

I wouldn’t be so quick to discount these sources as unreliable. TMZ is very rarely full of shit these days and Brad Pitt has a long-standing relationship with People Magazine. Read both sources carefully and you’ll notice a new or exclusive detail appear every time - a pretty good tell that it’s an intentional leak.  

If you enjoy being painfully uncomfortable, here’s the whole thing:

Fuck off Rachel. Jerusalem has always been the capital of Israel and we really don’t give a fuck whether America agrees.

I know i’ve done good coke when I have to run to the toilet after a line.