Next level.

No you’re not.

He puts it so—succinctly.

You’re in the Spinnin’ A. Smith Zone!

NPH is unfuckable because I’m straight.

That’s acting! I can just feel that carbonation washing cattle carcass off my tongue and teeth and rushing down my throat during that scene...

One of the best parts about getting fast food to me has always been the opportunity to get fountain soda. That is by far the best, ranking way ahead of soda from a can or bottle. When I told my wife my theory, I was blown away that she disagreed and said they all tasted the same. To me, the ranking is clearly 1)…

Even in the afterlife—Donnie Moore and Steve Howe are still getting shelled by Dave Henderson, er...Rev Halofan.

“You know we play on the South Side of Chicago, right?”

Ah yes, billionaires...

I didn’t know it was possible for someone to make Skip Bayless seem tolerable.

I hope Dan doesn’t! Could you imagine the backlash?! For not using *You’re!

Does chicken companion cluck? Perhaps make disgruntled sounds of annoyance and frustration like the Aflac duck? That would be sweet. Either way, it’s a steal at 49 cents.

I agree, but it’s a fact. Tell them that.

So you’re just going to gloss over the fact that Monica Bellucci is the Bond girl?

African-Americans account for the lowest voting population. So this chart doesn’t correlate. That’s why it was such a big deal when Obama ran, they came out in record numbers. When there are only white candidates, how can they relate? So the bible thumping, uneducated, who live in the delusional world of the south and…

I believe all of this happened. The sworn testimonies and even his story to Harbaugh.

“It’s about violently dominating anyone that stands between you and what you want.”

I really thought someone would have shown this:

Seahawks punter, Jon Ryan: