Obligatory.

If only Doug had the pitchman power of Troy McClure.

That mission was pretty crap, but it would’ve been a minor annoyance if it weren’t for that absolutely bullshit call for help. I don’t know how anyone played that and thought, “yes, this is a fair and entertaining thing to include in our game.”

I want to... i-i-i-ink you from your head to your toes.

Of course not. This is a ludacris fantasy:

“I’m not dense, my mom says my concentration of mass is perfect!”

You’re either being intentionally dense, or you’re the genuine article. I don’t know how I could make my point any clearer, but you keep missing it.

To someone unfamiliar with football, the basic actions performed by the players are still comprehensible. A ball being thrown and caught. A player running forward and getting stopped. All of that is understandable without any additional information. In a game like League of Legends, a non-gamer wouldn’t even…

No. You’re missing the point. To somebody with no knowledge of video games, you can’t even tell which real-world person is causing which thing to happen on the screen. It’s utterly meaningless. Not just difficult to understand. I could watch a game of soccer and understand which player is kicking the ball without…

I don’t enjoy watching sports either, but e-sports are even worse. You don’t have to understand the mechanics of more traditional sports to be able to understand who is pulling off a feat and appreciate the skill or physical prowess necessary to pull off that feat. With most video games, a non-gamer wouldn’t even be…

No, and not only because it isn’t a physical activity. It would also, for the vast majority of audiences, be incredibly boring to watch.

I think I have a pretty good idea of how it works. My theory is that the server generates a grid and then populates that grid with pokemon (each located at a specific coordinate within that grid to determine where they appear when you encounter them). It then uses your coordinates to determine which grid cell you are…