When I was a kid, I used to wonder, “What does ESPN stand for?”

So what’s the NFL’s endgame here. They could easily stop the protests dead by just removing this stupid dick-waving “patriotism” they only introduced a few years ago.

A PR stunt so shitty that even the milquetoast Peter King felt comfortable firing off a critical take.

To be fair, his wife did save at least $100 in taxpayer money by not purchasing a Peyton Manning jersey from the official NFL shop.

Really hoping that wasn’t J.J. but Ted Cruz in a Watt Texans shirsey.

It seemed pretty bad based on JJ’s expression and also how the injury happened. I don’t know why, but it almost always seem that the injuries that come from non-contact situations are pretty bad.

Look, the appropriate respectful Thurston Howell III attire manifests on true patriots when they stand for the anthem. Then it morphs back into a ratty Colts jersey when he sits back down.

“got all decked out in Colts gear”

I just love the concept of how many guys had to agree to this before the game even started and just how well it comes across. These kinds of celebrations just make you smile.

It’s a shame he managed to grow a spine after he decided to retire?

What a fucking goober.

OK. I now associate you with disseminating the Erin Andrews peephole video or suggesting in a deposition that the cutoff age for posting a sex tape is 4 years old. Hope that’s cool and a reasonable understanding of the material here at Dead Spin dot com.

“Don’t associate these guys who work for Barstool Sports with Barstool Sports” is a pretty out-there take.

I loathe Barstool but PMT is not even close to being in its shitty, misogynistic 37-year-old-frat-guy orbit. PFT Commenter and Dan Katz are successful because they know how ridiculous these mouth-breathing morons with no perspective on sports (or life) can be. I think even the PMT guys dislike being associated with…

As someone who avidly listens to Pardon My Take but very seldom finds myself reading Barstool Sports, I think it’s important to note that PMT is unique in that it does not rely on the humor referenced in this post (played out sexist, racist, etc. jokes), and instead seeks to satirize all of the stupidity that happens…

Hey, Cam, remember how you feel when people ask if a black QB can learn the intricacies of an NFL offense?

As someone who grew up as Chargers fan (from up here in the wilds of Canada), let me say Good. Fuck ‘em. They are dead to me, and I hope the ghost of Dan Fouts’ Beard haunts Spanos until he begs for help from Ryan Leaf.

We regret to inform you the water is racist

As a non-Pats fan, let me just say: fuck ALL of you Pats fans.

The only statue in Baltimore that could use more protection is Joe Flacco.