Mental illness? Mental illlness??? Sounds dangerously close to millennial illness to me; In my day, you played with a compound fracture. You got on the bus even when the bus driver was smashed, falling asleep, with a super Arby in his hand.Be a man. Get on the plane and fly young fella. This is what we pay you for.…

See! Right there! Straight from the Fast and Furious franchise.

The Jets will trade up, draft Lamar Jackson, and then make him a converted WR.

I believe you’re in the wrong neighborhood.

“You left a 5 year old car?” 

Did I mention how dumb I was?

The ladyfriend has a ‘07 Camry.

Easy as hell to work on/maintain, great gas mileage, comfortable on long drives.

It has a time and place.

Melt it down, pour it into a measuring cup, pour it back on the butter dish, freeze the dish, then cut the butter back out and add it to the recipe. idiot

I’m starting an Aerosmith cover band in which all the songs are re-written to discuss Drew’s boner(s).

“Drew Has Got a Boner” syncs better to Dude Looks Like a Lady than it does to Janie’s Got a Gun.

The problem with using a picture of your significant other as your phone wallpaper is that it’s awkward to ever change it away.

Time to step up Twitch and prove that your new Guidelines are more than just pretty words on paper.

I bought my phone case on Amazon, and saved the thumbnail of it to use as my wallpaper, so my phone looks the same inside and out.

Working in my dark garage without my headlamp

Rich people riot over the weirdest stuff. There was a riot at the Paris Opera House in response to the initial presentation of Igor Stravinsky’s Rite of Spring. Imagine this, but with rich old ladies clubbing each other with their walking sticks:

Lol this whole thing is funny to me, especially since he’s so known for joking about the sexual predation of a black comedian.

Great Game, and not to take away from OKC and what they did, but the referees handed them that game.

It wasn’t so much Corey Brewer as it was Marc Davis who won that game for OKC.

Edit: Also, DC is the man.

I would rather talk about my feelings than watch James Harden play basketball.

Harden has the corniest game of any superstar in the league. Beyond that fugazi foul above, half his drives involve shoving the ball into a defender and snapping his head back while shrieking. It’s genuinely unwatchable. Which sucks, of course. I’d really like to enjoy watching the team with the best record in the…