Promotion: First 10,000 Rockies fans get Dingers on their cars!

See, guns really DO kill people!

Well I’m the dummy that did not even get the joke for 5 posts and then realized All Takes Matter wasn’t the actual name.

Fade in to Patrick Duffy lying in bed.

Jeez, how do they afford such high grade talent, their fees must cost a small fortune each. Where did they get the money?

Amused but not at all surprised by how many people completely missed this one.

did you intentionally name only players who play for other countries?

What say you, the 73% of commenters who went to law school?

I do not buy the whole idea that when parents proudly make awful decisions that lead to their children’s deaths (like leaving loaded guns lying around, failing to get the child proper medical attention, etc.) the death should be the parents’ punishment. These parents neglected their child to the point that he died,…

She thinks she’s transgressive.

I'm not taking the music advice of a dude who has somehow existed most of his life without eating some of the most basic and common foods. 😑

was honestly expecting this to end in:

Yes because catenary offends the senses so much more than jersey barriers.

There’s a typo in your article. You forgot an “O” in “doomed” in the second paragraph.

Who is sitting next to JR? Did Dellavedova manage to get fat as shit in just 1 week?

145? That’s deadly. Is Chandler, AZ on planet Mercury perhaps? Didn't know it got that hot on Earth.

Yet you never see people in cold places throwing steaks into snow drifts and pulling them out frozen an hour later. It’s a double standard, I say!

Well I’m a Blazer fan, so fuck this question.

Sure, a guy eating shit is gross. But let’s not ignore that there’s just shit chilling around Cleveland, during their biggest celebration since the renewal of the Drew Carry show.

**EDIT** I’ve been informed that it is horse shit. Probably from a parade horse. You’ll excuse me for not watching a video of a man eating…

“This man is the greatest winner in basketball history and unlike Robert Horry he was a focal point on every team he played for.”