This might not get even one millionth of the likes that it deserves. But just know there’s a man in Washington, DC who can’t stop smiling.

No, NOT Mike Pence.

No, no, ME! I’m referring to myself! I was the one smiling... I’m smiling.

It’s delicious and I’m going to hell for it. The only reason I even know about this thing is because of you. The only reason I’m not going to eat another one tonight is because they’ll be closed when I get out of band practice.

The whole Thanos thing is also his fault, if anybody forgot...

I don’t think it’s an issue of him being made more unpopular by attacking African American women. I think it’s an issue of him coming for the wrong people, and African American women having fewer fucks to give than anybody else in the “wrong people” category.

Grand Opening. Grand Closing.

Fuck no. Get the bag NOW. Evaluate the rehab later.

For all the shit Bill Simmons gets around here, his takes are recycled like Dasani bottles at a Colby reunion...

THIS. And that’s before we get to the part where I’m willing to bet anyone who will take it that, cap space pending, the Washington Wizards would offer Durant a max, regardless of how well he recovers.

People forget how markets work. Every single year. It’s always funny to me. “________ isn’t worth a max!” and “I…

Your last clause is the most important counterpoint to the rest of what you typed. Kobe was showing some signs of early onset washed-ness BEFORE his injury cluster.

If you’re going to argue against that single example, though, you also have to squint real hard at basically 98% of the post-Achilles people who were receiving less-than-current-standards health care...

How the fuck is D’Angelo Russell “relatively unheralded” when he was the second pick in his draft? The only reason he isn’t still a Laker right now is because he filmed a cuckholding video of a teammate that would have rated a 3% on Pornhub due to the absence of the giant ass of a cultural appropriator...

I’m curious as to the “intriguing skills” that you’ve seen that would make the Magic inclined to “let go of the past” and “let him develop?” And how would that process work, exactly? You have to look a pretty long way backward in the past to find any semblance of skills that he might “develop” and, at present, it…

I read this as being about poorly-defined boundaries, period. Not just at office parties. And that Babe.net piece was significantly worse than just “not perfect” and it would have been significantly closer to “perfect” if it was doing something other than Babe.net’s own fucked up standard for “its best.” But you have…

There’s a fun game I like to play called “... now imagine if this person was Black...”

I haven’t had the Crystal Wheat/Old Chico (haven’t even heard of them!) but Celebration is magnificent! And I really dig Hazy Little Thing too...

I’d much rather have Torpedo or Hop Hunter...

I’m gonna leave this here for you. But you should really be posting it to Samer...

I just love how every one of you “I just want to win the election” people is riding around on a 1" tall high horse like you’re presenting a revolutionary concept to the unwashed masses. No. Fucking. Shit. You want to win the election. So do I. So do the Republicans. So did Gary Johnson and Jill Stein. So did Ross…

They lack basic self-awareness. It’s... beautifully tragic!

Any “drink this or leave it behind?” beer is high up the list... Doubly so if you’re called on it and respond with a stern “Leave no man behind!” command. Housekeeping might have some... rules... preventing their staff from accepting the hooch they find in the hotel room. Or maybe they’re worried about germs. Best to…