Gotta be fun getting lunged at by a grandpa who you could probably beat to death with your bare hands...

Y’all missed the sneaky-good part of that video:  Tatum goes to hold Smart back by grabbing him around the shoulders. When Smart pushes his arm away, Tatum makes a “suit yourself!” face and starts walking away completely. He gives zero shits about whether or not Smart catches hands at that point.

Are you serious? He was pushed, in the middle of his back, from behind while literally walking away. I get that he’s bigger than Marcus Smart, but that doesn’t change physics. Do you think Smart pushed him just hard enough to jiggle him a little bit?

It didn’t really strike a nerve with me. I don’t know you and I’m not really in a position to care what you think or what you say to your friends. It just struck me as stupid and short-sighted. Everybody in the NBA is better at basketball than you probably are at whatever it is you do best. Jimmy Butler’s “awful game”…

That wasn’t advice. That was just me insulting you. If, instead of the Nick Foles piece, I’d concluded with “Shit the fuck up!” THAT would have been advice. Good advice! I didn’t say that though. I just insulted you.

Trouble is:  So is Beto.

Re: 2, sometimes, when we’re visiting our friends in their home town, we do the things and go to the places that they want to show off...

What would it take for me to write off a favorite restaurant? Significantly more than this. This was one night of shitty service stacked up against multiple great experiences. You seem to be putting the weight of your embarrassment (about someone else’s poor service, I’d add...) on the scale alongside the one night of…

This is why a significant amount of the sports fans in the country treat y’all like Boston and hopes you get Space AIDS. Dude has barely been in town long enough to know that Jim’s is vastly superior to both Pat’s and Geno’s and you think you’re in a position to have a “fuck Butler tirade” (to say nothing of having…

“...after the Dukes and Kentuckys and North Carolinas had finished picking through the entire country’s elite one-and-dones.” 

We’re watching different movies...

This dude is 6' 4" and 282... Pro-athlete... And his job is facing off with guys 20 or 30 pounds heavier than him. Sometimes two of them. How much do you wanna bet that three or four of these red shirts DO NOT WANNA WORK AT COYOTE UGLY anymore?!?!?! I’m sure they get the occasional massive (for a civilian), over-served…

It would be one thing if he was being vague in a calculated-for-triangulation way. I literally think he just speaks in well-meaning platitudes because he has calculated that that’s what people want to hear. He realized that it’s easier to get elected when people know you want good things for them than when you spend…

You know nothing, Feltimus Peltus.

This is stupid bullshit. I don’t go to the train station to catch the escalator. I don’t go to the mall for a free trip on the carnival ride known as the escalator. I wasn’t in the airport for the escalator. I literally never go anywhere for the escalator. The escalator is a tool that is taking me to/from where I want…

So wait... You have a congenital heart condition and lack proper medical care... and you’re mad about someone pointing out that something you take for granted is extremely unhealthy, will likely lead to a “premature” death, and quite possibly due to cardiovascular disease? Because “taxes.”

Ok. As you were. 

When the guy who puts toilet covers on the floor thinks your take sucks, you should give up your Internet access forever!

That wasn’t something you could figure out before you left the house?

If you don’t like them, why haven’t you just spent the better part of your life... not wearing them?

Are you a Democrat? Because if so, I have at least $20 for your Presidential campaign. Maybe I was raised by a crazy person but people give far too many shits about what other people they aren’t sleeping with think about them.

Your beard is weird.