Like if my 80 y.o., super-frail mom dies, I get the life insurance money. I don't want my mom to die, but if she does, SCORE!

Also, how about answers like, "2 syllables: cray-ahn" then "2 syllables where the 2nd syllable rhymes with 'dawn'"????

A fellow Californian I presume?

He's just making fun of Rick Pitino: "Hey Rick, watch me have sex 25 times!"

I get your point, and agree with his inclusion, but I disagree that his exclusion is akin to leaving Cy Young out.

And as a product of US schools (probably), aren't you suppose to know things like that? (irony intended)

I'm biased against people who use "bias" when "biased" is the correct word. Sorry...it just bugs the hell out of me.

Colon was introduced to the NY media in a press conference. At the end, Mets' president says, "No more questions now, and I mean it!" Colon replied, "Anybody want a peanut?"

wat

Came here specifically to post some variation of the "matchbook" joke, saw there were already ~25 replies, and knew I was too late. Damn.

which is exactly what his teammates were saying in the locker room

This, on the other hand, is the GREATEST thing ever written: affixes mouth to leaf blower exhaust pipe, tapes nostrils shut

Drew, I'm a dad whose youngest is 15. Thanksgiving is now, again, just as you described it. It gets better.

You watch the Macy's Parade?

You watch the Macy's Parade?

Jeff Kent had 6 straight seasons with 100+ RBI (counting stats works for Hall of Fame for some reason) plus is career leader in HRs for second basemen. I think he has a good shot.

The HOF list goes like this:

Rumor had it this guy was the worst tipper and forget about ever picking up the check

You think that Regina is cold, you should see my wife's!

Watching her hands hit the ice and immediately slide out will keep me laughing for hours.