I thought Twitter was supposed to be for when you wanted to let your group of friends know when to meet up at Starbucks. That’s literally what they said when they were first starting to grow. Now it’s purpose is for celebs to tweet about their surprise pregnancies and world leaders to toss out thoughts* about their…

Popeye’s red beans and rice is my favorite side item of any fast food restaurant. It’s not homemade but it’s still damn great.

FYI, this deal price is for Amazon Prime customers only. I’m not one, and the non-Prime price is $11 higher.

FYI, this deal price is for Amazon Prime customers only. I’m not one, and the non-Prime price is $11 higher.

Well the guy DID try to bottle and sell New York tap water. And now he’s working on monetizing meditation... At least he’s sticking to his main strength: marketing.

That’s not a list of Pauls, THIS is a list of Pauls!

And a sack!

I don’t remember the regurgitating bird sketch, but it sounds pretty tame compared to Pre-Chewed Charlies.

Damn! I must have skimmed over that part. This dude is only 35?!?

Protecting the neighborhood.

No one’s going to mention how D.T. had the balloon shot down at the end?

Those were FAKE VIEWS.

To be quite frank, if you are fearing for your own life, and the safety of your 4-year old daughter, not to mention the fading life of your innocent boyfriend, you should be able to put any damn thing you want on your Facebook if you think it’ll lead to you getting some help.