I’m convinced he wears diapers.

I would honestly prefer that his extinguishing event happen on live television (perhaps the State of the Union?) because I honestly feel like we deserve to witness it.

If you had millions of loans tied to Russian banks run by Putin, and had been laundering money for him and his gang for decades in order to secure those loans, and if your election to POTUS was due to Putin tampering with the US election and having our voting machines hacked, you’d be puckering up too.

Meanwhile, there are huge protests happening throughout the city right now. So big, in fact, that the Independent is reporting Melania Trump is trapped in her hotel room (or, Senate guest house room)

even if he had a hotel, what makes you think he could find a car to take him there?

I don’t have the skills to insert either Trump or Christie’s face in here, but you get the idea:

The cruelty in those pictures is astounding. Everyone just stood around watching Christie instead of trying to save him by rolling him back into the ocean.

Chris Christie Hit With Ethics Complaint

I heard if you insert a chocolate coated tampon into your vagina you will shortly afterwards poop Hershey’s kisses. It true. I read it on the internet. I think it was Goop.

That was a major senior moment. Scary.

Give what a try? What did you fucking try? The only thing you tried was tweeting fawning dumb shit that in no way indicated any sort of formal agreement so your braying shithead supporters forgot you campaigned on being ‘tough on Jyena’ and ‘labeling them a currency manipulator day 1'. Instead we’ve had no indication…

I read this article and right away knew people would have a field day with that comment.

In that twitter video, did he just miss the GIANT CAR in front of him? WTF?

“Donald Trump doesn’t like to do his homework. So in an attempt to get him to actually read the shit they are putting in front of him, aides have prepared memos in “tweet-length sentences in the hopes that he’ll actually read them.”

True story! Also it wasn’t the manual transmission per se, it was that the shifter was a three-in-the-tree. Vulcans ain’t got no time for that completely illogical nonsense.