“...Mr. Trump did make me a promise, and I will be better off when it’s fulfilled, and I do believe that my kids, they’re gonna be more secure too, so that is why I’m here today, I’m collecting on the promise. ‘Cause Mr. Trump promised me that he will make America great again and that’s the only thing I’m askin’!

I think it’s probably alcohol and perscription drugs

There is. It’s called the parking lot of the Dairy Queen.

Plus, I heard Hubie just got a new four wheeler. well, not new. He bought it rebrobushed from this mexican out back of the Dollar Tree, but it still runs real good and all. Anyway, Hubie says we can take a ride on it if we bring him some beer. He’s got one a…

Um, maybe you’re the thirsty one David Spade. Nobody gives any sort of fuck what you think about basically anything.

I have a hard time believing that an artisanal, locally-sourced, hand-crafted, gluten-free, organic, bean-to-bar chocolate maker would misrepresent their product in this way.

Trump: Ain’t nobody got time for that! Ban Mexicans. Ban Muslims. Ban anyone that isn’t white, over AARP age, and makes less than $250m a year. That’s how we will make America great again.

I fail to see how his middle name has any bearing on this conversation, he’s the President of the United States address him as such anything less is disrespecting the office itself.

You’re criticizing someone for being an academic, holy shit what has this country come to, on top of that I am going to go out on a limb…

TOP.......MEN.

That’s President Obama, and yeah I would bet he did the man is an academic and I’m sure when he decided to run for president he hit the books and asked his advisers especially because national defense has been a big deal in both of his campaigns.

“or that he had no idea what the question was and just decided to go with some sort of free-form jazz riff on the topic of “anything nuclear.”

“Look, man, they didn’t give me alot of details. I’m just supposed to say, ‘America’ alot. America.”

*tumultuous applause*

Sort of off topic, but the lead image is what made me think of it... For me, one of the worst parts of Trump, is the level of disdain and annoyance he shows to anyone saying anything he doesn’t like.

How bout they focus on giving a hug and having a heart to heart with their trigger happy brothers instead of worrying about taking their gun into a crowded stadium before chugging some beers and doing a whippit in the linc parking lot.

Thanks, Obama!