Wow... where to begin? No Whitlock? No Bayliss? No Vitale? No King? No Schilling? (I know he was up for Worst Tweet. Doesn’t matter. Fuck that guy with his bloody sock.)

Notable predictions from Stephen A. Smith’s ancestors:

Kevin Durant on Twitter: “Pause this but I’m rockin to that lil Dicky-Russell Westbrook on a farm. He put good flame to that pound cake beat”

Now show me on the doll where the Warriors touched you.

RUSSELL!! I play this after every big game he has and a Thunder win.

And that’s what separates pro athletes from the rest of us, that willingness to devote unthinkable chunks of their lives to honing skills that may actually only pay off a handful of times each year.

Still a better Thornton Quote -

As a Boston scumbag, I look forward to smoking a pack of Parliaments and drunkenly pissing myself on that bench.

GOP: Please stop voting for the large, clear garbage bag we filled with the dusty semen of our elders and had a woods witch bring to life with an enchantment many years ago. The experiment went horribly wrong. I mean, sure, the animated bag of old republican semen had a stunning academic run and just, sort of, kept…

To the guy whose fiancee puts mayonnaise on hot dogs:

Cam Talbot had a fantastic year which made up for their 49% Corsi-for (2oth in the NHL). Unfortunately, Cam Talbot no longer plays for the Rangers, and I’m not talking about last year (in which their goaltending also bailed them out), I’m talking about this year where Lundqvist bailed out an even worse team,…

So is it that the Rangers had a 47.9% Corsi-for percentage (26th in the league), or that they had a 93+ save % (leading to an unsustainable 102 PDO) that makes me a know-nothing about hockey?

We’ll see how good Zatkoff is in the later rounds. The Rangers are a terrible puck possession team that (like every damn year) are carried on Lundqvist’s back through the season and playoffs. Without him, they don’t even sniff the playoffs this year, and you can see how their play disintegrated after his own numbers…

Adam LaRoche to Sex Trafficker: “But what I do have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you.”

Good lord, did Rick Reilly ghostwrite this piece of shit?

Get a clue, loser.

True story, I was never big on Van Gogh until I took truffles and went to the Van Gogh Museum in Amsterdam. His style is absolutely perfect for psychedelics. That experience (among others) has convinced me that museums are specifically designed for people that are high.