¡Si Señor! ¡Si Señor! ¡Si Señor! ¡Si Señor!

True story: went to a small high school in northern New England (like 60 kids per class). We had an English exchange student join us for his senior year, and he was, as you might imagine, instantly the best player on our soccer team. EVERY single game he’d get a yellow card for swearing. One game he got double…

lucky them

This is a good lesson to make it part of my practice, and also a good example of the little differences between top quality officials like yourself and casual duffers like me!

Ben Simmons almost turned him into Joel Embid.

OK, smart guy. How would you cover a guy who’s not even on the field?

Johnny Football

I am shocked to learn that a man who looks like he does lacks self-discipline.

Holy shit, if you can’t trust football coaches & Catholic priests these days who can you trust?

Strike that.  Reverse it.  He has 193 more FTs than FGs.

He traveled back to the three point line, which the refs didn’t call, and then got an undeserved foul, which the refs did.

Let’s see you guys make a jumpshot with your mom on your back.

Danny is like a good farmer. He knows it’s best not to give them names or else you grow too attached. Ainge just calls them Moveable Asset 1, Moveable Asset 2, etc.

Imagine Your Boss Is Michael Jordan, And Imagine He’s Angry Enough To Hit You

Seeing how Mack and Amari Cooper are thriving in new locations should be enough to get Gruden indicted for fraud and/or grand larceny.

I’ll be honest, I’ve never even heard of Harold Baines

That’s nothing. You should see my boy when we tell him we’re going for walkies.

They should pad thai refs so this won’t happen in the future.

I’m doing this to demonstrate my leadership.

I guess this means Marty is stuck in 1955 forever. Just like Mike Pence and the rest of Indiana.