If he is removed, is anyone else really really terrified of the blowback from MAGA brainwashed?

As nice of a warm fuzzy feeling it is to think of him gone, I’m also really scared that people are going to get hurt or killed in the aftermath.

I feel like Fridge Raider is the type of guy who, no matter what beverages you make available on the counter, he’s still going to snoop and steal from the fridge. The solution doesn’t apply to fuckin WEEIIRDDOOS like that dude.

Usually I hear “oh handful” when the girl is growing up conventionally beautiful. Which is EVEN WORSE.

Too much money, not enough taste.

dI work at a winery and my first week was a lot of learning how to properly clean and carry wine glasses. I shattered one in my hand while polishing (hot glass is fragile y’all) and my elder coworker looked at me and said, straight faced and deadpan, “You know that comes out of your paycheck, right?”

Turns out he’s…

I met someone named Shauna today.

#dudewheresyourdaughter

I’m so glad I know this story.

oh shes an awful actress, but she ain’t ugly is my point.

oh sweet jesus, that was ten lifetimes ago. #kenyadiggitlives

I’m picturing a livingroom with several friends tripping over furniture while moving random objects (lamps, soccer balls, an orange) around a very confused and awe-struck young woman sitting on the couch and it’s honestly making me so happy.

I smoke weed maybe once a year and I roll BOMB ass joints. They’re works of art. I have made many friends with this skill, even if I don’t partake.

I can tell you exactly how to get rid of it.

The only problem is, the guy who can’t blow up balloons won’t be able to do it.

I can’t for the life of me figure out dishwashers. We never had one growing up and now I just prefer hand-washing my dishes anyways.

I’d feel ashamed to admit that I actually do this (without stepping ON the map itself) but hey, I’m not still lost in downtown Paris am I? No. I am not.

I still do this as well. I also use “Never Eat Shredded Wheat” to find my North East South West and count the knuckles on my hand for the number of days in each month of the year

why so mean, man? she’s beautiful.

softly singing “laaaambchop’s playalooong..”

Zöe Bell is wonderful!! I tweeted her saying I wanted to be a stunt double when I grew up and she was so rad and told me to go for it but be safe.

and I can only say that, personally, I would find a replica of a sword from KB AWESOME....I also know someone who has collected samurai swords and is the creepiest…

I went to buy beer on my 19th Birthday and was all ready to show my ID and it never happened. I was so disappointed...mostly that I could have been getting away with it before then.