I’m fully expecting him to break out the c-word.

He is as resilient as a tissue paper boat.

Any designers out there want to make a “Nasty Woman” t-shirt? My mom texted me in the middle of the night to ask for one, but my graphic design skills are pretty lacking.

Well, no one asked me, so they didn’t. It still felt very weird, especially because I was taller than her, even at age 11.

It’s also not fun when you’re 11 and your dad is 42 and his new girlfriend is 22.

I’ve been leery of them ever since I was a teenager, when I babysat for a chiropractor’s family. He was always inviting me into his basement exam room for an adjustment. Umm, no thank you. I’d rather stay upstairs with your bratty kids.

The Covenanter’s Prison! http://www.covenanter.org.uk/Prison/

Sadly (or not), I think I’m a psychic null; I’ve never experienced anything that made me think, “Okay, that was a ghost.” But I have visited some creepy places.

That’s also where hundreds of Covenanters (religious dissenters) were imprisoned, in winter, without shelter, after the battle of Bosworth Brig. Hundreds of them died. And the iron cages that could be installed over your loved one’s grave so that their corpse wouldn’t be looted for dissection by the medical college.…

This reminds me of the time I was 5, cracked my head open during s McDonald’s birthday party, and needed stitches. The hospital staff plopped me on a gurney with a pillow that was SOAKED in blood and just.... flipped it over.

Totally unrelated, but what on earth does Robin Wright do to her skin? She looks positively luminous.

I just did, so nah.

My prediction: this will be The 2016 equivalent of that woman who carved a backwards “B” on her own cheek and claimed she was attacked by Obama supporters:

Well, I’m worried about emotionally/spiritually dead people voting for Trump, so I guess we’re even.

My gastroenterologist told me that my colon looked like “a blasted hellscape.” Thanks, IBD!

My mother-in-law expressed genuine bafflement at Ivanka’s conversion thusly: “You’d think she would have picked up some values along the way.”

This is so great! We actually joined PBS to watch this season, and Nadiya is AMAZING.

I don’t think Melania was shading the Trump campaign. I think it was a statement of solidarity with her husband, a sartorial “fuck you, I got my $1,100 blouse” to the rest of us.

Per my pediatrician, crawling is not a prerequisite for walking. Not even close.

So lemme get this straight; he appeared on HER show and demanded that HER mike get turned off? Ben, that’s not how things work.