If I get to 75, I’m starting a bar fight. I want to go to County.

Fuck it, I don’t care if I die as long as I make it to, let’s say, 60. Everyone I know is going to be off with their kids and grandkids and I’ll be mostly by myself as a result, so eh, cut the shitty years off.

Aspartame doesn’t cause cancer at any level that any human could or would ever consume it.

Human life is a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% mortality rate.

So really, chugging soda will make you happy now, and and reduce you’re time of being miserable later. It’s a win win

Sure, it takes years off your life. But they’re the shitty years!! My great aunt lived to 92, which was about 20 years longer than it should have been. between the macular degeneration, osteoporosis and dementia, she ended up talkingto her dead relatives, complaining she couldn’t see them.

Tips for a healthy life

Here for a good time, not a long time.

I’d say I’m almost offended by their stupidity. If anyone encouraged someone on a plane to talk to me I’d get shitty with them.

Yeah, nothing makes he hornier than being crammed into an aluminum tube with 75 rednecks eating hot food and maybe wearing shoes while their cracker spawn fill the fuselage with their soft headed cries.

Honestly this game would appeal to me a lot more if their eyes looked something like that.

I love the amazing placement of the reticle in the thumbnail, making it look like the shark has cartoony eyes

We need to end the school-to-prison pipeline