“I don’t know” oh, what a jerk.
“I find you unattractive.” OH what a jerk!

Either way, you’d probably have an issue with any sort of rejection.

hahah excellent

that was BEFORE the ice cream ;)

I love everything about this photo because this is what I generally look like on any given day and I’m only now realizing how much the gay is coming off in waves

whoa am I just really bad at ages then cause she doesn’t look like any of the 14 year olds I know.

she looks in her twenties, what’s the deal?

Plus PB has never been hardcore. There’s no actual penetration in the magazines as that’s considered WAAAAY more risque than just nude models, even if they are showing the full monty....unless I am wrong and PB shows hardcore stuff as of late?

But I actually really like that idea.

Coophef.

KOOFEF

I like holding mine.

this just all seems like so much work. I enjoy my routine of feeling shitty about myself and then drinking until I don’t feel that feeling anymore.

And if I’m noticing a little weight gain I just switch to clear liquors and toast for a week and I’m golden.

ohhhh my god I am so excited I’m just gonna get piss drunk and laugh like maniac this weekend and maybe scare some small children on the way out of the theatre because what else is Valentines day for?

BOOTSNPANTSNBOOTSNPANTS

ohhhhmygod this is my favourite new thiiiiing

beatbox trick!? what is this!!

hahahahaha I totally looked at my phone and mouthed I LOVE YOU after I read that and it is indeed sad but hilarious

I set my Siri to have a British man’s voice and he is SO CONDESCENDING when he gives me directions that I frequently swear at him and they use Hey Siri just to ask him insulting questions.

Like, when I ask for directions I swear to god I can hear him sigh before saying “AL-RIGHT, I’ll get you (fucking) directions…

I just want my phone to know I care, okay?

I am so beyond jealous.

I love that the only thing she was worried about was your aversion to blood/needles. Good kid, makes me feel a little ashamed of being 26 and still too nervous to ask my doc about getting tested but then again, my upbringing was....er......tightly wound hahaha

omg if my mother only knew about the gay smut i was posting on FanFiction when I was a teenager, she would throw a fit

why do our moms think we’re such hussies! hhahahhaha