I’m old enough to remember Iraq because I’ve been there. We fucked it up.

Yes, religious art was the best. That’s because it was the only art. As soon as people started making secular shit, the religious art went away.

It’s annoying but I think the ah and oh could be argued to be interchangeable. Taco chips is a fucking travesty.

It looks like a teeth-clenched “stop.”

Are you talking about regular front pockets or the little tiny 5th pocket, because I’m talking about the little one. I’m wearing Levi’s right now and my phone, which is relatively small (smaller than an iPhone) is not fitting there. The pocket is also only like three inches deep.

They’re like 2 inches wide - your phone must be tiny because my typical phone doesn’t come close.

Cargo shorts have lots of extra pockets and I still care enough not to be seen in those.

BIG LITTLE POCKET!

Thanks, Frank Underwood.

I’m with you. Dad pride!

Damn. Your dad’s scalp must be badass. I’d have enough dandruff to make the other people in the elevator sneeze.

I think that jeans manufacturers are in with big pocket corporations. I don’t need that extra little pocket! Why is it there?! That’s how they get you!

Here’s what I use: shampoo. If you have short (for a guy) hair, you don’t need conditioner. You’re going to cut it off soon and damage won’t show.

Good one, Dad!

I’m still not sure. Is there a way I could come in and get tested to see if it’s right for me?

This doesn’t sound like someone who can distinguish delusion from reality. Many mentally ill people, though, still get labeled “sane” by courts and there will be a lot of public pressure to do so in this case. I don’t think it matters whether he’s sane or not. People will want him dead and will likely get their way.…

This one actually was severely ill. Is that a “take?”

Dr. Mating legally changed his name to that. It’s like buying a championship. I mean, I could change my name to Nuclear Powerpenis or something and have a chance.

I think he meant that there are typically 16 grams in a heroin cigarette and that 28 people died from smoking them then jumping in front of trains last year. The first one of those happened on April 20.

- Terry Pratchett