I call it “dancing with the moderately-known people” and I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT IT!

No shit! At least they try to balance it out with the cute doggy pictures from the K-9 unit.

Shade Court gives me life! Bless the Court!

The nail clipping one is my absolute favorite. Love the shards flying about. Cracks me up every time

Ditching my biological father was the best thing I’ve ever done. It was doubly hard bc he was toxic and bc other people pressured me to have a relationshiop with him. Other people just don’t get it... But I get it, Tabby, and I applaud you. Cheers to us!

My stylist actually requests that I come in with photos; she’s pretty amazing, I must say. I think most stylists will appreciate a client who has clear requests.

Yes! I went back and forth between hating her and feeling sorry for her bc she's so clearly a space cadet on a crappy marriage.

Yeah, was this supposed to be funny? Because: bad execution.

I also meant to say that I have an odd fascination with Goldblum and have been wanting to teach my dog a trick where the command is “Jeff Goldblum.”

I love Goldblum, but oh god, the little squeak when the dildos touched, I’m dying.

Omg I love this! do you have pics?!

Similarly, I always wondered if they were jealous? Like, so long as that tampon is in the vagina, their penis will not be?

Yes! I'm more and more impressed with her every day.

As a Chicagoan living in New York for the past 13 years, I'm SO HAPPY!! YAY HOMETOWN!

The tiara makes her look like Princess Buttercup! (I mean, that’s a compliment, but it also means the tiara is a bit much.)

Constance Wu is brilliant on that show! I hope they realize they hit the jackpot with her. It also helps that Jessica Huang speaks to me as a character; when she drowned her sorrows in a Chipwich, I realized we were soul-twins.

SOLD! I want one!

I saw a bum gun at Home Depot recently and I was really intrigued. Pardon the super dumb question, but, is it easy to direct the water without spraying all over the damn place— like, they’re not BIG sprayers, right? Also, now your bum is wet and you've gotta put your pants on right away, no time for air drying like…

I didn't have one either! Slut from the womb, bitchez!

I have truly no idea— but when my SIL did IVF, out of handful of eggs that were fertilized, only two were “viable” and they knew that the two were female before implantation. My SIL always jokes that it was bc females are stronger. So anyway, I guess they did genetic testing on the embryos, that could be my only…