Andrea's face is permanently frozen into a "I just smelled the nastiest fart" appearance.

Agree. I was not spanked a lot but when I was, it didn't really change my behavior, it only made me resentful that I was subjected to such a punishment. I try to lean towards techniques that have a longer impact. What does my child like or enjoy? Well, that's the first thing that goes if she misbehaves.

It's the weirdest thing: as the sight of all three of my grandparents has deteriorated to the point where I have to read the bill and figure out the tip, their tipping has increased substantially.

The subterfuge! I have had my parents spot the money and say "YOU LEFT MONEY ON THE TABLE!!!" thus the "going back for my sweater" ploy.

I was a bartender once at a dive bar, where one of the specials was pints of PBR for $2, and a pony (about 5 oz) for $1. One night this young guy comes in and asks what a pint of PBR costs. $2 I say. He hesitates, and asks if there's anything cheaper. I say we have 5oz glasses for $1. He asks for one of those, I…

One time, I was yammering away to my college boyfriend about all the things I had thought about on my walk back from class today, and I paused and said, "Man, there is just way too much going on in my head in a given moment. What were you thinking about on your walk over here?" and he was like, "...I dunno. …

Ohhhh you're 12 days out? Oh man, I've got 9 or 10 months. Pumpkin beers sound amazing and like exactly what you need!

Yup. When my boyfriend and I decided to get married, I was like, "Great, OK, so now we're engaged!" and he said, "No! What? I want to propose! With a ring!" A couple of months went by, and I finally pointed out that if we realistically wanted to get married next summer, we needed to be booking stuff. He was…

Mr.Infinium and I got married at year 5, and that first year was hard. I don't know why. It was just unusually contentious. Partly because of chores. Seriously, I don't think his mom ever made him do chores around the house.

"did you ever have him do chores around the house? Ever?" This is my constant inner monologue to my fiance's mother. I work approximately twice the hours that he does, and still, I live in a pigsty because he doesn't see a mess and think, "maybe I should clean this." Last week, he loaded the dishwasher, and when I…

I love my partner so much, but every now and then I will have a moment of, "This is so weird. It is so weird that we are committed to a life together. I have no idea what you are thinking right now. You are a whole other person and a huge mystery to me. What the fuck, humans and society are just so bizarre." And…

I never understand why people get so upset about other people bothering with it. My fiance and I live together but are having a wedding because

Silly women. Defense is for men!

"Rickey never kneed nobody. Rickey a loner."

Sometimes it is an easy decision. Sometimes there are no emotions involved at all. I feel for women that struggle with it.

Storm of syphillis was my metal band's first album.

I know I am safe from STDs because I am yoked by my husband's sex. His sex is an umbrella sheltering me from the storm of syphillis that threatens the fabric of our family.

Most of us were at the MNF Chief's game setting the new World Record at 142.2 the day before, so ya, getting loud isn't a problem for KC. Such an awesome game to be at!

Most impressive to me (crowd wise) is that the stadium was still full at that point.

Lost in all the "Fucking Yost" comments this morning is the fact that Eric Hosmer played a lights out game. His catch at first to turn the double play in the 5th probably saved at least a run. 3-4 with two walks, a triple, and scoring on a wild pitch....