Dude, half-assedly do Weight Watchers and do Zumba... more to dance around like a fool and de-stress than anything else, if you want a human approach to it. Or don’t. Or just eat the fucking muffin. Yes, you ideally “only get married once”, but I counter-argue that you’re not going to be on your deathbed like, “I’m SO…

Yup. Yup yup yup. And let’s not forget the cruel lie that exercise does anything. I’ve gone to gyms. Five days a week for six months. Didn’t drop an ounce. I walked myself into multiple asthma attacks and sciatica. Not a fucking ounce. Yoga five, six days a week. NOT A FUCKING OUNCE.