“What are you looking at?” she asks. Eyes up here asshole.

‘and sharp cheekbones that protrude like tiny cherries, even when she’s not smiling,’

ZAYN DUMPED PERRIE AND LOUIS CONFIRMED THE BABY

This is going to be long, because I have a lot of pent up feelings.

This weekend I saw a girl exiting a club wearing a shirt that said “I Hate Monday’s” and I freaked her out by rapping on her taxi window and shouting “the apostrophe on your shirt is grammatically incorrect!” just before the car pulled away.

guys my new life goal is to make bobby marry me

I am delighted to learn that this is a real thing.

It’s like Comic Sans got drunk on chardonnay and started wearing a cheap pink feather boa.

“Oh for fuck’s sake! Stop trying to make your boring ass babies cool with my last name.”

They sound like failed Who concept albums.

let him fucking live his life, randi.

some time in the mid-90s I fell out of my bunk bed and hit my head. My parents took me to the ER, and the doctors asked me various questions to determine my mental status. One of them was “Who’s in charge at the White House?” I deadpanned “Hillary” and had the whole ER laughing. I was seven or eight.

What does that even mean? How can you become an activist too fast?

2 and a half men

In the UK, the verb “to trump” actually means “to fart”. True story.

On the issue of guns... Being Australian, I never, ever see guns. Our police don’t even always carry guns. I am in the minority of people who have actually used a gun (I shot at a can on a distant relative’s ver very rural farm), and I don’t care to do it again. So it scares me to think these mass shootings have been…

Sorry, Nat Wolff, but John Green novels about teens & especially movies adapted from John Green novels are bullshit.

Who fucking cares? Seriously. Who. Fucking. Cares.

Shirtless shenanigans aside, I just can’t get over how beautiful the series is. My god. It’s so tactile. It’s an embarrassing word, but it’s sensual. You feel like you could reach out and feel the texture of everything you see. You can smell the salt in the air right through the screen. Cornwall is incredibly…

This, one is actually the all time best