Your remark made me laugh. My favorite part of the Ocean's movies has always been watching Brad Pitt chowing down.

My coworker and I used to joke about starting a band called The Closers, where every song title would be a line from the movie. "Always be Closing." "It Takes Brass Balls to Sell Real Estate." "The Leads are Weak." We figured three people in the audience would get it, but those three would really appreciate the joke.

I think it does. :-) I hope your kids end up just as awesome as the Obama kids. It sounds like they're well on their way.

You might also add that that personhood amendment would also force criminal investigations of all miscarriages, since obviously if a fetus is a person, their death would have to be investigated. I'm sure every woman grieving a miscarriage would love a visit from a police officer trying to figure out if she killed her…

Ooooh, that's hardcore!

Oh my god, I hate that person. The one in my office doesn't even do this for important things, she buttonholes me for trivial things like some random press release she just got, or the most recent phone call. And she doesn't even explain what she's yapping on about, so I get no backstory before she starts in on me. So…

Can you smuggle in a little hand-held fan and blow it back in his face?

If homophobes want to clog their arteries and have heart attacks at 50 that much faster in the name of bigotry...I don't really object to that.

Actually, I bet her shoes are very comfortable. The RNC paid top dollar for them, after all.

Seriously. How unjust is it that Hitchens is dead and this cocksucker is still alive?

Wow, that was the most accurate and devastating commentary on this whole ordeal I've seen, and no equivocation about it.

I like Planet Fitness! I've never seen anyone get kicked out for grunting but I like that the rule is there.

That sounds f*cking annoying! I don't understand people who insist on talking to strangers at the gym, unless it's "are you done with those weights?" Who the hell wants to talk to some stranger when they're sweaty and concentrating on something else entirely?

Women can just go to Planned Parenthood? You mean the PP you and your conserva-tard ilk are trying to demonize and defund? That one?

The best service I ever received was at Manolo Blahnik, when the salesguy actually got on his hands and knees to put the $1,100 sandals on my feet. Which were smelly because I was wearing $20 Payless sandals. He was nothing but gracious.

I don't understand why Ann Taylor sales staff are that snooty. You're an employee at a mid-priced store. You don't work at Prada! Every time I've walked into an actual high-end store like Armani or Manolo Blahnik, the staff have been nothing but courteous and helpful, even though it was clear I wasn't buying anything.…

People like your friend are the reason why people who actually have disabilities get shit on all the time. She should think about that the next time she thinks it's cute to fake a disability so she can sneak her precious pooch into a store.

If that were true, we'd have had a Pres. Bartlett already. I'd have written him in in 2004 if I thought it would have worked.

Oooh, well played!