But your mother didn't make her statements public, did she? And you still found out about them. So what is avoiding publicly saying this doing, other than ensuring that other people who may have these feelings continue to feel alone?

I get this, although this is probably one of those narratives that's more about understanding a different perspective on the norm rather than gaining sympathy. But there's another side to it too. My own experience is that people can express those things (openly or passive aggressively) and still be capable of good…

Oh, man, so much this. A child and a mother are both human beings, and, as such, both equally entitled to emotional health and fulfillment. But what to do when the existence of the child negates that for the mother? It's certainly not the child's fault, and the mother may well have had no choice in the matter, either.…

The problem is deeper than that. People feel obligated to have children due to social pressure, and they hear a lot of "You'll feel different once it's your own" sort of bullshit. So really we need to change this dialogue.

Well, Stuart is 33 now, and can probably handle it. But yes. Children should not be burdened with the brutal truth that they are a cinderblock tied to their parents' neck. Because they aren't responsible for the situation, the parents are.

Thank you! I would be all for Dutton's and Hsu's articles if they'd published them anonymously. It's great to let mothers who feel that way know they're not alone, and they might be good cautionary tales for women who feel pressured into having kids and get convinced - by society and by everyone around them - that…

I think another thing that isn't talked about is that parents excel at parenting at different points in their lives and their children's lives. I think my dad was a great parent when I was a little kid. He helped me explore the world and learn and be curious, but as I got older, I think he put too much pressure on me.…

Hi Yoga Nerd. Haven't seen you since we talked about ADD and pregnancy awhile back. It is weird because I was going to post this same thing only with the opposite view.

This is why I don't want children. Well, I've never wanted them, really. But my husband does and he thinks everything will change and it'll be fine and he'll help so, so, so, so much and I'll be a great mother! But I'm worried I'll hate it and resent the children; children aren't stupid and they'd know. They'd know…