This costume makes my eyes rain.

I guess we should just be grateful he didn’t go as Kirk Lazarus.

why does every round up of late night hosts overlook the King, Graham Norton? The winning formula: Throw a party, invite everyone at once, let them talk to each other and respond to each other’s stories, and serve booze. 

The White House Halloween party must feature an appearance by Nosferudy Ghouliani, who scares children of all ages (and, one presumes, bears the scent of sulfur).

How messed up are your life priorities that you spend your Sunday afternoon angry commenting on blogs about how other people lack self discipline in their life habits? 

I don’t watch Midnight, Texas, but Dylan Bruce from Orphan Black is in it so I may have to start. He is...how do you say...quite attractive.

with all the shit going on in this world, i am getting drunk tonight on white wine like basic bitch i am .

is believed to be a while male armed with an AR-15 and multiple handguns.

Arachnophobia is the one true scary movie because, unlike ghosts and psychotic leprechauns and haunted staircases, it is entirely plausible that a highly lethal strain of spider exists in some distant, underpopulated corner of the planet and it could somehow get transported to the United States to mate with common…

Also, that’s how you get Australia. 

But then you’ve got to get a snake to eat the mantis or the lizard, and then you’ve got to get a coyote or a mongoose to eat the snake, and the house is just going to become unlivable at a certain point.

She doesn’t even mention that, though, and neither do any of your other best friends in office - including Steve Scalise, who was one of the people shot. They are just talking about how mean they think Democrats are to them. They are always fucking whining about it - talk about snowflakes. As for the shooting, they…

Oh! Well, then I take it back. It’s a cute name. :) 

Yes, except Hemsworth is on a haunted hayride and comments on everything as Thor would:

Halloween Situational Best Chris:

Just a reminder: your love of Chris Pine comes Captain-America-approved.

What you don’t realize is that YOU only see that as being her biggest draw, and that YOU are being sexist in thinking so. You state things as though they are facts when they are not. Work on your self awareness 

“I realize now just how physically demanding the gig is”

Thank you for finally speaking against Tatum, your stand has inspired in me the courage to say that he has a block head.

Eh, considering our current Dear Leader and his coterie of deplorables are using the office as a massive grift, I could give a shit what the Clintons do as private citizens. This “hellworld they very much helped create” narrative is a false one. Morons who thought the garbage that Trump was peddling are the ones we…