Hey guys, I’m going to Indy this year, so I’d be happy to track this motherfucker down and kick him in the nuts. Or slap him. Or flick his ear or call him mean names or something. Let me know— I take requests.

He’s not always in front of the camera— Wilmore does a lot of work writing and producing. He’s currently a producer on Black-ish, and is really involved with Insecure— he’s the co-creator, producer, and writes for the show too.

I loved Madonna in League of Their Own, she was perfect in that. Her “So You Tell Old Rich Mr. Chocolate Man That He Ain’t Closing Me Down!” monologue still makes me tear up.

Okay so, wow, you really can’t distinguish between someone putting out a visual and another person putting their hands on that thing?

Yes! I was so annoyed when I heard we were getting yet another Spider-Man movie before Black Panther and Captain Marvel, but damn this kid won me over in Civil War, and now I’m so excited for Homecoming.

I always loved her segments on Conan. I remember one time she was teaching him how to iron and he was deliberately fucking up, and you could see it was like, legitimately driving her nuts.

I’ve got a big lump of extra boob fat in one of my armpits, it’s super noticeable in sleeveless tops, and gets so tender right before my period that it affects my sleep. My doctor has suggested looking into surgery to have it removed, but that getting insurance to cover it might be a battle, as they’ll likely rule it…

I sat through Jade (with David Caruso) with my sister because of her deep and abiding love for Michael Biehn. All I remember was the killer kept jars with his victims’ pubes in them, and I was about 12.

I need 7th grade the girls convinced our teacher to show Tom and Huck in class during our Tom Sawyer unit.

Several small ones are ok, but put them on totally different locations then. In my opinion*, if you’re going to have several on your arms, they should be cohesive, and preferably just be a sleeve.

God is...

I’ve always over-tipped, but since my brief (and failed) attempt at waitressing, I try to be as good a tipper as I possibly can. I lasted less than two weeks, that shit is HARD.

I miss my Sephora splurges. I haven’t had VIB status in like two years because I almost never buy makeup anymore. Actually, I bought a thing of NYX matte liquid lipstick from Target a couple months ago, and I really like it— I might have to buy another one in a more springy color next time I’m there.

Ok this is awesome. I love Lauren’s voice, and I really dig the fact that she didn’t switch gender pronouns— I hate when artists covering a song do that (see: Joss Stone and “Fell in Love With a Boy”).

I thought I liked Hardwick because I really enjoyed the Nerdist podcast (and I had a crush on Singled Out floppy 90s hair era Chris Hardwick) and then I realized I just like Matt and Jonah.

Goddammit I love Scott Lynch. His fantasy novels AND his Twitter are treasures.

It’s like how when I told people my dad had lung cancer, the first question out of their mouths was always “Did he smoke?” If that makes a difference to you, like it’s ok if he was a smoker because he “brought it on himself,” then you can fuck right off out of my life.

All I can think of...