And how many times have you walked into the bathroom and seen multiple towels on the floor and wondered, “Whose towel is whose?”

To be fair, if I were in danger of rubbing a towel on my face that may have touched Mike Pence’s post-shower balls, I’d be washing them daily before I showered, too. I mean I hang my boyfriend’s towels and my towels in different places and also don’t freak out if they get changed up, but Mike Pence’s balls.

There’s a whole section in “The Feminine Mystique” where Friedan talks about how labor-saving devices actually created more work for the stay-at-home woman. One of the example I remember is women growing up and the sheets and pillowcases got washed once a week, on laundry day, but suddenly it’s 1960 and there’s a…

This is ridiculous. Who washes towels every day? I just incinerate them immediately and have my personal shopper purchase new ones.

People with way too much energy that they’re desperately trying to redirect from something else.

I have no idea. I wash my towel once a week.

Listen, I don’t a woman’s vaginal secretions touching my godly penis after it’s been washed.

That’s what I’m saying. I live in California, where there is a drought. I can’t in good conscience wash towels every day or do laundry every day. As long as my towels smell okay, they go back on the towel rack. I don’t care if the towel I just used was used by my boyfriend a couple of days ago. The only time I don’t…

Psychopathic religious zealots

“My grandmother’s balls were so big she wore them on her chest.” is giving me a desperately-needed warm fuzzy right now. That is a fantastic statement.

Yes we all remember the “Fabulous Civil War”.

Omg, so horrible and hilarious! This dude always reminds me of a thumb with a goatee drawn on it.

Aw, crushing Toby is one of my favorite Tobys.

Two things:

Unpopular opinion; I actually love the Keira Knightley version of Pride and Prejudice because the actors were all the right age for once, the costumes and settings looked lived in and realisticly kept, it’s beautifully shot, the soundtrack is wonderful and they showed a shyer side of Darcy. I actually wish it was…

Fuck I don’t know but goddamn I want to stare into his eyes and hump him forever, integrity be damned

“The swamp will not defeat him,” he said, breaking into the third person. “They’re trying to resist me, but it’s not going to work.”

You guys ever read an interview with someone and say to yourself at the end: “Holy shit that guy was on a lot of cocaine.”?

the person who did this to you is a heinous bitch. i’m so sorry, you are a great sport to even consider this.