I bought a 1967 Alfa Romeo Duetto back in the mid-nineties. This car had not seen any real maintenance in over a decade, and many original parts had been removed or botched together with home made devices. One day I am driving it around, and the car just drops dead. Completely non-running stall. I coast to the side of…

It is impressive. It is an amazing technological achievement. It is a showpiece that shouts to the world, "How do you like me now, motherfucker?" It is MONUMENTAL. It is several million perfectly machined and lubricated pieces, quietly whirring and hissing in self-satisfied harmony. It is utterly, totally,…

And if you park on Ferrari in there, the whole thing will light up faster than the Hindenburg.

The road and speed limit of this particular stretch of asphalt are unknown

Go home, BMW, you're drunk.

Harder than you'd think with today's cars.

I've saw a pair of migratory homeless crust-punks on Houston Street at 1st Avenue in NYC one summer night watching a movie on a laptop hooked up to an outlet in the open door section of a light pole. Shit you not.

Protip for all you young folks out there: Be sure to image search "Goatse".

Herd my ass. That's a small nation.

So basically...

10% sales tax, 9.3% income tax, earthquakes, wildfires, massive drought. I'll take 3 months of snow thank you very much.

Lumber bike with worthless 80/20 road biased tires. What are those? Avon Distancias? Least they could have done was throw on a pair of TKC-80s.

Well, I was going to suggest using your laptop and "$14-15 worth of parts from Radio Shack" to bypass the security system of someone's car that has AWD and snow tires... but I feel I've missed the point of this article

Haha yes! It's bad enough that Kinja has a site called "Lifehacker"... let's not let it spill over into Jalopnik territory.

Can we please, PLEASE stop using the term "hack" when we really mean "tip"? I am so beyond tired of hearing about "life hacks". You're not hacking a goddamn thing, literally or figuratively, using any definition of the word.

No problem. I just called my time guy, and he's credited you with seven new minutes, to be implemented on March 16, 2015. You'll get them at 5:41 pm, and they'll end at 5:48 pm. I added the extra two minutes as my way of apologizing for all the suffering you've undoubtedly been through. Hang in there; we'll get…

Tune in next week when Tavarish tells us about the time he went to North Korea and discovered an unmolested, low miles NSX in a cave right next to a sleeping unicorn.