I’m the God that wrote the Constitution with his dick and wants babies to have guns and wants pregnant guns to have babies and then I want to send all of those babies, both gun and human, to war.

...if there’s one signifier of executive competency it’s adherence to rigid and unchanging dogma based on a collection of myths assembled over centuries by corrupt oligarchs with political agendas.

Contact the author in heaven.

King Louie

Tribble

In written communication: Hairball

Il Duce- Like Mussolini, except Americanize the pronunciation to “Ill Douche”?

Rafiki’s Ass

Sleep, water, and activated charcoal face mask (diy). A few days of getting enough of those three and my skin just glows. I think it's probably mostly the sleep.

I want to love Aquaphor, but I can’t get past the fact that it gets all over EVERYTHING. I get that it’s supposed to sit on your skin and not absorb quickly, but that just means, for me, that any time I try to use it, there’s Aquaphor everywhere. On the lamp, in my eye, coating the sheets, in the kitchen somehow even…

Yep. You can pry my giant, ugly floppy hat out of my cold, dead hands.

Does it help with indentations, or just pigmentation scarring? I’m still desperately searching for something to help my mild indentation scarring that isn’t a $6000 laser treatment. I’ve tried retin-A and it’s definitely made my skin fantastically clear, but hasn’t really fixed the uneven skin surface issue.

i totally believe in AHA toners/creams and AHA peels. but i couldn’t really say for sure that anything else i’m currently using is actually working.

Retinoids & sunblock, aka things that science has pretty conclusively proven prevent signs of aging. :P

Retin A and sunblock. You don't need anything else if you start early.

Agreed on the Origins mask. I generally believed that all that skincare crap is totally bunk, but I was manipulated into buying this during a moment of weakness/desperation at Sephora. I actually see a visible reduction of gunk in my pores. I’m breaking out less and my skin isn't dry as hell after use. I admit my…

I’m a true believer in Retin-A for wrinkles. I use that shit every day and will never, ever stop.

I think the only topical treatments that have been proven to make any kind of difference are retinoids and Vitamin C. I use both. Is my skin better than any other 31 year old? No. Will it be better in 20 years? Maybe.

Fuckface Von Clownstick

Rug