Interesting. I never knew the Godfather and at least its first sequel had become irrelevant. I would respectfully disagree.

We really do love our American cousins to the South... but I gotta say, you guys are getting more unhinged by the day. Not to say we don’t have crazy people in Canada, or guns for that matter... but this is just... ya, wow.

Aw, this makes me sad. Always loved your articles Allison. We will miss you!

Aw c’mon... Take your damn star and go.

Not a craving per se, but I frequently have dreams in which I eat toilet paper.

Regarding the picture for this article though, why does the place setting include a scalpel?

With a dull knife, or a pineapple to the anus.

As a Canadian, I couldn’t agree more. Love you guys, but your laws are fucking insane.

Or the marriage? :D

Followed by beer and cannabis.

Almost 2 decades ago, I was tricked into downing a spoonful of Blair’s Mega Death. It is an experience I will never forget. My entire face was on fire, for 2 or 3 hours. I’m not sure eating that sauce equates to “starting small”.

I can see it now:

Personally, I am still waiting for the return of Dog!

I know justice isn’t exactly the hallmark of any “justice” system because we live in a slightly more cynical version of 1984 merged with Kafka’s Metamorphosis and the Hunger Games... but at the end of the day, is anyone actually surprised that this guy was basically given carte blanche to exercise his small minded…

Why didn’t the HOA... What, wait. Seriously?

Oh god! The literal horror!!!

Strawberry is fantastic. Moose tracks is also good. Mint chip however is an abomination that shall never disgrace my freezer with its reprehensible presence. That’s right. I said it. Mint chip is the dog food of ice creams.

Heh. The Long Beach Police take hate crimes seriously... what about when they are committed by officers?

You should come to Toronto. We have basically elevated them to revered mascots of the city at this point.