Someone needs to brush up on their Tonakh.

Obligatory “No low-ballers, I know what I’ve got”

Yeah, you’d think the Feds would be smart enough just to run a CarFax on it, duh!

Definitely not a necessity car.

Her father, the inventor of the Toaster Noodle, would not be too pleased to hear about this.

It's kind of hard to throw the book at the guy who's holding it.

The Dutch can have him. He sucked balls against Mexico, and the highlight clip didn’t show one single defensive play. For a defender that is supposed to be the savior of a shitty defense, I’d kind of like to see that. 

“And when I say brother, I don’t mean it like an actual brother, but in the way that black people use it. Which I think is more meaningful.”

Can you guys ask the venture capitalists to make articles take up less space? It’s kind of hard for me to watch both of the “recent videos” that started playing in two separate places when I’ve got four or five lines of text distracting me.

The only other black person on the list ^^

When Lampard even started picking Pedro over Pulisic, things really did look grim.

Metamorphic being the one with the most cross-generational appeal

Chevy wouldn’t still be making trucks today if it wasn’t for Seger.

The most classic rock is igneous.

Hey man, drunk Joe Namath still asked for consent.

Where does she think she is? A fucking Applebees??

“Horton, Here’s a Poo!”

“The shitters are getting bolder” is a phrase I never thought would pass through my mind, yet here we are.