Yeah I need to get in a fight with and/or break up with my husband or something to prep.

Ok her whole standup special at the Apollo was based on how ugly and fat the world sees her, but a lot times the jokes just fell flat and were mean and outdated. Also I was pissed because she’s been getting really good marks for that special and I thought it was mostly unremarkable. I look forward to a lot of her…

So I assist in a pre-k tumbling class, and there was this adorable 3 yr old girl that was spitting. She was put into time-out, but when she started kicking at walls, I decided to take her to the office til she could chill out. Once we were alone, she escalated to calling me a bitch. Multiple times. I didn’t fault her…

Exactly. I thought the same thing - just replace all that “boy/girl/princess/Prince” crap with “kid” and improvise: hey, kid, nobody wants to be around a jerk, so until you decide to stop being one, you can chill here.

Thank you for clearing that up. This is the only comment that matters.

So...I saw “tears part Chris Hemsworth” & “fanfic” and I think this might be the only fanfic I need in my life. Do not be selfish with the goods. Let me read it and I'll tell you whether or not you should publish it. (Answer: yes.)

Assholes.

She is just a gift to the Earth. That quote is amazing and needs to be framed in the Library of Congress - that'd be pretty funny actually.

“Extra gorgeous” made me throw my head back and villain-laugh over my noontime bowl of cereal. I can imagine looking at that sign like “what the fuck?” Oh shit that’s hilarious. Whose idea was that? Because they're fired.

I didn’t realize until I read that link that his friends that died were not mere friends, they were 2 of his CLOSEST friends. That is truly HEARTBREAKING. His support system, his chosen family - the very people you know will be there when shit hits the fan - are not here to help him. I would be DEVASTATED &…

Gahdammit. Dammit to hell that’s going to be in my motherfucking head all night. Shit. Hemsworth’s beautiful fucking face and angelic hair with that perfect smirk followed by Hiddleston’s I-don’t-know-what-the-fuck-that-is-but-I-wanna-fuck-it...damn it.

I get that it was a lifetime ago, but many of his contemporaries are very publicly alive and well, as are his children. For instance, I have no problem discussing Thomas Jefferson’s infidelities, probably because of how removed from the current context his life seems. This Lennon/Ono story has a lot of elements that…

Whoopi is an actual idiot. Good for her. She works hard at it, and its finally paying off - we all have opportunities to be idiots, but she worked her booty off and did what she had to do to get voted on. She'll give an amazing speech, I bet.

I get you. My first reaction was “this is gross”, because I think it’s kinda morbid to discuss a dead person’s sexuality, especially if the person didn’t even get a chance to explore and/or publicly announce it for themselves. There’s a “too soon” element in here, for me. But there are plenty of other instances where…

I knew Ben was down. My teenaged guilty-pleasure crush can resume.

I’ve got 2 kids, and for some reason even when I only have 1 of them with me, my brain is still busy as if I’m taking care of the both of them, plus all my bags, their toys & snacks, etc., and I’m just as distracted - so I could very well not notice that something has happened. Especially if the kid is behind me and…

Yeah I just feel super-sad and sick to my stomach when I read stuff like this (as a recovering alcoholic). I felt like I was living in an alternate universe when everyone made light of and cheered on Jessica Simpson’s recent not-sober appearances. I’m not against people enjoying themselves, even getting hammered here…

You know you’ve made it when your DUI is on TMZ. “I made it, Ma!”

This storyline has been running for at least 2 seasons now. I’ve caught a couple episodes where it touches on some marital discontent, but the hubby drives me bananas with his forced Disney charm faux concern. He’s hardly around, I get he has to work a LOT to provide - but he is so enamored with the “new” wife and the…

When returning to work after my mom died, my boss red-facedly blurted in front of everyone, “I’m sorry.” The room went silent and it felt like everything was moving in slow motion...I said, “Oh you don’t have to apologize, you didn’t do it!” and exited a room full of open mouths.