They're tying to make the words bigger so they're not words for ants...

#bootstraps

Duh, no one needs to get an education since we all have famous and wealthy parents that will ensure that we have careers. Wait...

I am posting here to request that every article henceforth be headed with a dinosaur silhouette picture relevant to the content.

Smoking in bed when your arms aren't long enough to reach your mouth.

At least he's not from Lebanon. VANNA'S SON SHACKED UP WITH LESBIAN.

Jesus, really? "Fat as fuck?" Girl on girl crime, man. It's a fucking epidemic. "Never eats" should not be an aspirational standard!

"You can’t transform her yet." Anyone else severely creeped out by that "yet?"

She loves diverse bodies so much that she can't wait to change them.

you can catch autism from her saliva

OR MAYBE, JENNY, GUYS ARE AFRAID THAT YOU HAVEN'T BEEN PROPERLY VACCINATED.

I'm not gay, I just don't want to get measles.

Seeing as just watching the epic Krasinski/Fallon lip synch battle made me feel pregnant, the news about Emily Blunt expecting is not a surprise.

The child is expected to be born taller than average and eventually irritate his Montessori teachers with his tendency to smirk at an imagined fourth wall.

If i lifted 460 lbs i would make a bronze statue of me doing so and i would stare at it when i masturbate.

I know, right? I feel anyone I was actively fighting with who asked me to sort out our issues on a cliff would be met with a "why don't we do that while I cling to a chair in a crowded Starbucks?"

I guess you could say he FELL HEAD OVER HEELS For her

If you're a father, of course you can parent your daughter. If my parent you mean guide her and encourage her to make her own (good) decisions while letting her know that she's bound to make mistakes and that's okay too. Not so much if you mean police her budding sexuality in such a way that you make her ashamed of…