i have literally never slept over after a hookup and the very thought gives me the screaming willies. sure, complete stranger i just met, i’d love to be unconscious in your bed for 8 hours. i’ll just leave my wallet, phone, house keys, and car keys here in plain sight. this absolutely seems like a worthwhile tradeoff…

When I was a freshman in high school, my familhy went to visit my great uncle who had both smoking related illness of some kind and alzheimers. During that trip, he routinely forgot who we were and my great aunt, second cousin, and family just worked around it. I got done up for a big midwestern dinner because I was…

I had the opposite experience at my grandfather’s funeral. One of my grandaunts already had slight dementia and hadn’t seen me in a while. She didn’t recognise me and asked somebody else who “the beautiful blonde woman” was. I think that’s one of the only honest (no false politeness) compliments I ever got.

Sometimes I want real Mexican, sometimes I want Chipotle. I don’t pretend there’s any crossover between the two.

While I would never step foot in one of his establishments, I do enjoy Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives, for the fact that it gives national exposure to local chefs doing great things in the culinary world.

But he can step off making fun of Ina Garten. That woman is a damned good cook, and her recipes always work. You know if you’re using something she wrote, it has been tested to within an inch of its life and the results are reproducible. Sure, she’s privileged, but she owns it and she is good at what she does.

I don’t understand the obsession over Chipotle

I was born a Polish human girl, but I really identify with the bradypus sloth. Does that get me any love or ridicule around these parts? I’m adorable, vegetarian, and I only poop once a week!

She may have been born white, but in her heart she will always be Hawaiian Tropic #3a Medium/Dark.

Fitz > Jake.

“Elsie Otter is a wonderful name. I’d hire her”

We all just got charged $2.95 for reading this.