She needs run. And, if she won’t run, at least hide her diary where he can’t get to it. Because he smells hincky. Like the book writing type.

Unrelated. But she’s from my hometown. I always joke that she’s a huge deal because she’s the closest thing to a doctor to come out of Everett (Ma not Wa.) And it’s true that it is known to produce some tough broads (i.e. bitches) but the way she describes it in that interview is absurd. As if she grew up down the…

Exactly. Like... instead of going on a date with Grace and pretending that he was interested in a relationship, why didn’t he just ask her to fuck? Why did he keep pretending that it was ok to just chill, then continually pressuring her into sexual contact? Why didn’t he tell her to leave when he realized she wasn’t…

Exactly. She said that she moved her hand away from his penis multiple times, and he kept trying to put it back. I don’t know if people skimmed that part or think it’s okay, but either way, the response is depressing.

The word men means “more than one man” not “all men”. Pluralization is a very basic part of grammar.

As a man, this kind of argument is super weird to me, and I’ve really been baffled by the way men are reacting to this story.

That is not even remotely true. There was a litany of refusals, and at one point Ansari even acknowledged her clear discomfort. Observe:

She literally told him she didn’t want to have sex with him that night.

It feels like I read a different article than some other people. I keep seeing people dismiss the incident as “poor communication” or “bad sex” or people asking why “she didn’t just say no”.

She literally said “I don’t want to have sex with you on the first date”, which he responded with by giving her more wine. I have no idea what he understood/didn’t understand but there’s enough there that if it’s true, it’s pretty clear he should have understood.

I don’t know how you read that account and see a good faith effort by Aziz to understand and respect her boundaries.

The fact that so many people think this was just “bad sex” honestly frightens me. He literally ignored all verbal cues to stop or slow down, ignored the fact that she would pull away and freeze up, followed her around his apartment, and kept groping her and putting her hand on his dick. That is not bad sex. That is…

Hahahahahahaa no, are you my mom?

I have done a considerable amount of research on Pick Up Artists and the techniques they use. Everything about this story ticked the boxes of a Pick Up Artist “Escalation”.

NEVER PRESSURE ANYONE INTO SEX, OMG.

Huh? She gave both obvious verbal and non-verbal cues. And what needs to change is men need to start ASKING for consent, not using a lack of an explicit hard “NO STOP NO STOP!!!” as a way to try to push further.

Did you read some of the comments on the AV Club? They were scary. They made me scared for the women that come into contact with those men.

But some of these people in the comments are just saying this was a bad date. I mean, thought bad dates were listening to someone drone on about there ceramic collection but I guess I’m wrong. I guess I can see now how fingers forced into a mouth is a bad date. Yep. Nothing out of bounds there.

Jezebel, What Are You Doing? Days of silence on the topic, and then what comes forth is not actually the thinkpiece on sexual coercion and the “ways consent can feel blurring”, on how predators purposefully use bullshit excuses about “miscommunication” to get away with it, about how Ansari is more representative of…

This piece is unreal. I’ve been looking for Jez’s take on this for over 24 hours. They haven’t covered it at all except to say that Babe did it badly. Way to have those tough conversations, Jez