That’s why I occasionally drive by and throw trash in the yard of the guy who works the night-shift at my corner gas station. “Fuck you, Roger! Why my gas and smokes still so spendy?”

I guess Uncle Jesse forgot his big sister, Pam, was KILLED by a drunk driver!

I am in third grade and we are on the way to Disney World. I am stoked. It is my first visit. This is a budget Disney World vacation scrimped and saved for by my middle class, penny pinching parents, so instead of flying we were packed up into the family mini van for two days of driving from the south Texas coast to…

ooh! Ooh! My mom’s family is from S. Florida, so “family vacation” always meant “visit Gramma and Grampa in Ft. Lauderdale. Cool. It has a beach! My grandparents live like, on the damn beach so my brother and I would jump out of the car, throw on a swim suit and run head long into the water on a semi public-ish beach…

I’m not sure how much of an outright disaster this is, but it was pretty funny, so I figured I’d share.

It’s summer and my dad is presenting at a conference in Hilton Head, SC. I am dragged along, even though it is during my 17th birthday. As a 17 year old I am already pissed at my parents taking me away from my friends, instead of letting me stay at home alone(so I can throw a House Party rager!) The evening of my…

I’m logging the fuck off.

Your naiveté is so refreshing.

Brody posted the image as a joke because he thought the “Licking 4 my keys” caption was funny .

When I was young I was really into celebrity gossip. Almost the first thing I learned, over a decade ago, was that Cosby was a rapist. If a teenager girl in the middle of nowhere knew a smart guy like Hef knew.

Forget the ridiculous third reason for a moment. Why do there seem to be so many otherwise intelligent people who don’t seem to understand that the vast majority of the time it’s not appropriate to act on your sexual impulses? Literally everyday of the week I work with and walk by women that I am attracted to,…

How is lady wall street possible? Ladies doe not fianance. Ladies cannot brain for numbers! Do not be mad. I put ladys on a peddestel!

Michelle Phan spoke with Cosmopolitan Magazine recently, and has this to say on feminism:

this is one of the only situations where i really feel my age in a bratty way—in that, damn, burkett is really dealing in SUCH A PASSE QUIBBLE FOR QUIBBLING SECOND-WAVE OLD TERFY PPL

“Daddy’s Boy” is up there with “Werewolf Bar Mitzvah” as far as things Tina Fey shared with the world, thus making it better go.

Julianne Moore.

My pops is black and my mom is white, and when they got married in the early 80s in buttfuck Colorado this was quite the anomaly/scandal. They couldn't find a black groom cake topper so they just sharpied in a white dude. Nothing says “special day” like blackface on your wedding cake

Less cake-related but rather young-family-member-meltdown-related ... My littlest cousin lives overseas and we’ve only met a couple of times - but we wanted to include him in our wedding ceremony when he was about 6 so we made him a ring bearer. By all accounts he was super excited until he got to the rehearsal and rea…

Thank you!