Heard of Best Friends Animal Society? It does an incredible job of caring for animals and leading outreach but it has a very bizarre, cult-origin. https://www.opposingviews.com/category/best-friends-of-utah-the-process-church-of-the-final-judgment-to-animal-society

Gotta rub sardine oil all over him first though.

LOL LOL LOL Jez hasn’t been feminist website in forever. I am not attacking her sexualtiy, she is dumb and her family made possible to put reality star in white house. She makes little girls look up to her and make it normal to be misogynist, but go on. 

Eh, Taylor and Kanye both suck.

In this timeline? Hah! She'll be Trump's next SCOTUS pick and Kanye will be Pope.

Why?

Forrest Gump?  Boat...doesn’t sink!  A rare win for Tom Hanks.

Is Tom Hanks an ACTUAL CRISIS ACTOR???

(I’m a bit stoned right now, and this feels like a very profound revelation.)

Joe Vs. The Volcano--end up on a raft made of luggage.

No one should be surprised. Tom Hanks and travel do not get along.

So apparently Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson have just tested positive for coronavirus.

This isn’t an average American shower, I’m sure. It’s going to have multiple shower heads, some sort of seat, and probably enough room for a small book club to meet on Tuesday evenings.

Lies. Shower sex, while technically possible, is almost never pleasurable*

It seems his whole ‘sickness’ appearance is a classic mafia move. At least during the Italian mafia reign in RI in the 70's-90's, several of the bosses who were on trial would fake heart attacks or exaggerate other conditions to post-pone conviction, gain sympathy, etc.

Me reading that paragraph from Grimes:

Grimes describing her hotdog and butter diet

Isn’t that just potato soup?

I mean, personally it just sounds like Grimes once again revealing herself to be a giant fucking moron.

Me: Maybe cable news can dedicate a few minutes talking about a Nazi showing up at a Jewish guy’s rally.

The fact that the kid said she shouldn’t quit performing because she makes bank is also incredibly sad.  Britney has long been the family ATM - I wish they showed her more respect.