No, of course you wouldn’t. Neither do I.

Okay. Just make sure you brainwash him that an invisible zombie is in love with him. Not in a gay way, but sorta in a stalker, plutonic, guilt-driven codependent friendship with ambiguous gay overtones.

Congratulations to surrendering to the Patriarchy. Just deny you’re a part of it and you can claim the mantle of feminism. Everything’s relative to you guys, anyways.

Only someone dumb enough the believe men an women are exactly the same would think such an analogy is valid.

Well, shit, according to your lax standards, I’d probably qualify as a feminist too.

This is a huge problem that women of color are preoccupied with.

I don’t own any guns, so what the fuck are you talking about? I’m for gun control, in fact.

Oh, I want you to believe that. I want to to accept everything you believe with absolute certainty.

Sweeheart, I don't care if you live or die.

Honey, trust me. It’s YOU we don’t need. We’re tickled pink to be rid of you and your kids and your fat asses.

Yeah. Never mind the virgin birth, zombie horseshit. Sister Mary was hip!

That should smooth over the whole child rape thing.

Yeah I think you nailed it. That's exactly what it is.

Yes, from what I understand from lapsed catholics’ understanding of their religion, nothing is expected of them. It's like an honorary title. You make mom and dad happy at thanksgiving and get to dress the kids up on Easter.

Your cats are all you need.

I wonder how many women become ‘woke’ later in life, lonely and childless, realizing they pissed their youth away for an ideology that denied them their instincts?

Yeah. I’m Catholic too.

As long as you take a knife to your son’s genitals, they're happy

I like the one where the kids gets her brain scrambled from too many blows to the head from a soccer ball and negligent adults preoccupied with ‘life lessons’.

I just think that man is so outrageous. He says the most crazy things.